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  • mistermuse 1:01 am on August 18, 2020 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: Don Redman, , Jo Trent, Lazy Weather, luxury, Peter DeRose, relaxation, Socrates, Thomas More,   


    After my last post (“RELAX”), the title of a possible sequel (“RELAX REDUX”) came to me….however, further inspiration waned, leaving me a title in search of a post. But fear not. We artistes are too artiste-tic to give up a half-asinine idea without a fight….and, in time, a way forward hit me: if RELAX REDUX became the asinine half of a whole post, the whole post would be half-asinine if the second half of the whole were also half-asinine. In other words, the second half of the whole must be better than half-asinine, or the whole post is half-asinine.

    In short, to half or not to half — that was the question. The answer came to me when I asked myself what can be logically paired with relaxation to buttress a less asinine whole, and I answered myself: luxury, that’s what. Hence I appoint IN THE LAP OF LUX to serve as my better half….whether my wife likes it or not.

    So, Weather* you’re weady or not, it’s time to welax — er, RELAX. That’s half the battle.

    *LAZY WEATHER was one of a number of songs written by white composer Peter DeRose and black lyricist Jo Trent in the late 1920s (a time when such bi-racial collaboration was almost unheard of)

    * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

    Now on to IN THE LAP OF LUX:

    “Living in the lap of luxury isn’t bad, except that you never know when luxury is going to stand up.” –Orson Welles

    “If your neighbor has it, a luxury immediately becomes a necessity.” –Evan Esar

    “The older I get, the more I realize that the ultimate luxury is time.” –Michael Kars

    “Someone loving you back with all they’ve got is perhaps the greatest luxury of this rotten modern times, when lovers are easy but love is rare.” –Nitya Prakash

    “Contentment is natural wealth; luxury [is] artificial poverty.” –Socrates

    “Authentic luxury flourishes in the untying of self-worth from popular opinion.” –Ann Brasco

    “Utility is when you have one telephone, luxury is when you have two, opulence is when you have three — and paradise is when you have none.” –Doug Larson

    “It is only to the happy that tears are a luxury.” –Thomas More







    • calmkate 2:12 am on August 18, 2020 Permalink | Reply

      great quotes and love the music … the last is even this century, most unusual 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

      • mistermuse 2:44 am on August 18, 2020 Permalink | Reply

        That song is actually late 20th century, but still more recent than most of the music clips I post. In any case, who could “Don’t Worry Be Happy” as long as Trump is President!!!!

        Liked by 1 person

        • calmkate 5:18 am on August 18, 2020 Permalink

          well at least you are trying to stay more upbeat despite the current disaster!

          Liked by 1 person

    • equipsblog 9:34 am on August 18, 2020 Permalink | Reply

      Punultimate luxe-out.

      Liked by 2 people

    • D. Wallace Peach 11:24 am on August 18, 2020 Permalink | Reply

      Great song!
      Awesome quotes too. 🙂
      Thanks for starting my day with a smile.

      Liked by 3 people

      • mistermuse 12:06 pm on August 18, 2020 Permalink | Reply

        Tbanks, Diana. I didn’t think I’d find that many great quotes about luxury, so you might say it turned out to be an unexpected luxury of riches.

        Liked by 1 person

    • annieasksyou 11:55 am on August 18, 2020 Permalink | Reply

      I like your artiste tic! A fine affliction. But it sounded as though you were settling into your wife’s lap, so I hope the weight difference isn’t too deluxe ( in ad-speak).

      The a capella arrangement was great, though there were times when the burden of singing seemed to outweigh the ability to look happy. Not to stereotype, but all these guys look alike. Was this a tricky solotet (solo quartet)— or was it just my aging eyes?

      Liked by 2 people

      • mistermuse 12:28 pm on August 18, 2020 Permalink | Reply

        Actually, it might be a bigger deal if my wife sat on my lap — but let’s keep that to ourselves, shall we?

        After playing that A Cappella clip again, I can’t answer your question definitively, but I don’t think they’re all the same guy. I used another video by the same group (or guy) in a post months ago, but I don’t remember which one, or I’d check it out.

        Liked by 1 person

    • Don Ostertag 2:32 pm on August 18, 2020 Permalink | Reply

      Great quotes and music. To Kars, “The older I get, the more I realize that the ultimate luxury is time”, I would like to add ‘and health’

      Liked by 2 people

    • Rosaliene Bacchus 2:45 pm on August 18, 2020 Permalink | Reply

      Enjoyed the musical clip by Cappella. Amazing how we can use technology today to clone ourselves! Randy Rainbow uses the technique to great effect in his song parodies.

      Liked by 4 people

      • mistermuse 4:12 pm on August 18, 2020 Permalink | Reply

        Indeed. i would use technology to clone myself but I inflict enough suffering as it is.

        Love Randy Rainbow. They should play one of his song parodies of Trump ‘virtually’ every night of the Democratic convention.

        Liked by 1 person

    • Elizabeth 8:18 pm on August 20, 2020 Permalink | Reply

      I was delighted by the video and more so with the Randy Rainbow “Gee, Dr. Fauci,” sung to Officer Krupke from West Side Story.

      Liked by 2 people

  • mistermuse 12:05 am on July 27, 2018 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , , , , , misfortune, , , , Socrates,   


    When misfortune comes, take it like a man–blame it on your wife. –Evan Esar

    • * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

    Many of us suffer an unanticipated misfortune at some point in our lives. It could be the missed fortune of being left out of the will of a rich cousin you loved like a brother (until the ungrateful s.o.b. left every cent he had to his actual brother)….or it could be distress under duress, like your mistress taking egress, leaving you in a mess, no less, with your wife. Or, if you are a wife, perhaps you got wind of, not only the mistress on the side, but the ‘steady at the ready’ and the ‘wench on the bench’ (otherwise known as having too many loins in the fire). Yes, friends, misfortune is an ill wind which blows no good…

    Now, far be it from mistermuse to blame his misfortunes on his wife. As a matter of tact, if it weren’t for my wife, I don’t know what I would do (or is it, wouldn’t do?). Yes, friends, mistermuse has been a sappily married man for 49 years, 10 months, and 13 days now, and I can honestly say it doesn’t seem like a day over 49 years, 10 months, and 12 days.

    That said, game on. Let’s see what other men have had to say on the subject:

    Wives are people who feel that they don’t dance enough. –Groucho Marx

    How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who treats her as if she were a perfectly natural being? –Oscar Wilde

    If Presidents can’t do it to their wives, they do it to their countries. –Mel Brooks

    No matter how happily married a woman may be, it always pleases her to discover that there is a nice man who wishes she were not. –H. L. Mencken

    My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you’ll be happy; if not, you’ll become a philosopher. –Socrates

    Some wives are like fishermen: they think the best ones got away. –Evan Esar

    I’ve had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn’t. –Patrick Murray

    A man placed an ad in the classifieds: “Wife wanted.” Next day he received over a hundred replies: “You can have mine.” –Anonymous

    NOTE: The last quote is absolutely NOT mine!

    • Paul Sunstone 3:16 am on July 27, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      So far a I know there are at least three or four major religions that each claim their own god created the institution of marriage — and everyone of them say they did it to protect the women, which I find hilarious.

      Liked by 3 people

    • calmkate 4:31 am on July 27, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      lol hilarious .. big 50 celebration coming up, well done both of you!

      Liked by 1 person

    • masercot 5:33 am on July 27, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Women are the major cause of mental illness in men…

      Liked by 1 person

    • Lisa R. Palmer 8:36 am on July 27, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Congrats on making it work!! That is quite an accomplishment for both of you…

      I laughed at almost all of these, being an ex-wife, except one, which I simply didn’t understand. Goes to show that humor targets certain audiences (probably based on common experiences…?).

      What the heck was Oscar Wilde trying to say here, and where is the “funny”? Lol!

      “How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who treats her as if she were a perfectly natural being?” –Oscar Wilde

      P.S. No need to actually explain; it only makes things worse. If a joke needs lengthy rationale, then it already failed. But since I’m not the intended audience, no harm done. Just thought I’d share my ignorance, as it might make it funnier to others. 😀

      Liked by 2 people

      • mistermuse 9:28 am on July 27, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        No problem, Lisa–I’ve found from long experience that explanations only get me into longer no-win situations. That’s why “Yes, dear” is almost always the better part of valor….and, as you can tell, I’ve become very well trained in almost 50 years. 🙂

        Liked by 2 people

    • Carmen 8:48 am on July 27, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Here’s the one I like, and which was stuck on our fridge for years –
      “The best thing a father can do for his children is love their mother”.

      Almost 50 years! Wow! We’re 9 years behind you, mister muse, which reminds me of another statement I read when I first got married – and it has stuck in my head because of its truth (well, in our case anyway!) –
      “Marriage is a contest of wills.” 🙂

      Congratulations and in my opinion, you brought the very best trait to the union – a kick-ass sense of humour!

      Liked by 2 people

      • mistermuse 9:32 am on July 27, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        Thank you, Carmen. Unfortunately, the ass I’d most like to kick is out of reach (not my wife–Donald Trump)! 🙂

        P.S. I like your “statements.”

        Liked by 1 person

    • Carmen 10:17 am on July 27, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      A friend of ours once told a young fellow who was getting married that there were only two responses he needed to know – “Yes, dear” and “That outfit looks lovely on you!” 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

    • arekhill1 1:26 pm on July 27, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Congrats to you and Senora Muse on your upcoming 50th.

      Liked by 1 person

    • inesephoto 1:52 pm on July 28, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Eternal source of jokes 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    • Don Frankel 2:13 pm on July 29, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Here’s some advice on the subject that I didn’t take. But I was happy anyway.

      Liked by 1 person

      • mistermuse 7:17 pm on July 29, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        Good song, Don. I like toe-tappers which don’t lead to my wife putting her foot down.


    • floatinggold 10:40 pm on July 30, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Almost 50 years? That’s impressive. How do people manage to put up with ANYONE for so long?

      Liked by 1 person

      • mistermuse 11:50 pm on July 30, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        First, you have to live long enough. Second, so does your wife. Third, it helps to have a sense of humor. Fourth, if your wife has a strong arm throwing pots, pans and dishes, it helps to have good reflexes. Fifth, when all else fails, either pray for a miracle that she’ll see things your way, or say “Yes, dear.” Or both.

        Liked by 1 person

    • MikeTX 10:49 am on August 1, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Congrats on the half a century of marital bliss Muse.

      I guess you have no wench on the bench; a fact which also keeps a foot from being put down…on your throat. Good luck on your next half-century!

      Liked by 1 person

      • mistermuse 8:07 pm on August 7, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        Thanks, Mike. Sorry about the delayed reply — I just noticed that your comment was awaiting approval.


    • America On Coffee 1:43 pm on August 7, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Love this!!

      Liked by 1 person

  • mistermuse 12:59 am on January 8, 2018 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , , Montaigne, , Socrates, theories   


    Do you have a favorite conspiracy theory? Not to be morbid, but my theory is that we have all been set up for elimination. The proof of my theory is that every one of the billions of human beings born before 1900* is dead (with apologies to a possible unknown straggler or two still hanging in there)….and there’s no reason to believe that anyone born post-1900 (who hasn’t yet perished) will be able to avoid this deplorable fate in due course. Let’s face it — the god(s) on high created a helluva mystery down here, and we’re the fall guys.

    Of course, there are many who believe there is no death, professing that the body will be resurrected with the soul in a next life — even  cremated bodies, whose ashes have been scattered to the four winds and seven seas, will go to that great watering hole in the sky for another round. I would drink to that theory, but given the untold millions who have suffered agony in this go-round, who could drink enough to forget that the hereafter operates under the same management as the present? Raising the bar won’t bury the past.

    Now, unlike most conspiracy theorists, I do not hold my theory to be the god-honest truth. It could be wrong. Maybe the gods have a heart; maybe we will live forever. Michel de Montaigne wrote, “Socrates thought, and so do I, that the wisest theory about the gods is no theory at all.” A rather unconsoling thought, perhaps, but one, at least, that’s not dead in the water. In any case, there’s no use losing any sleep over it.

    *If you doubt that billions of human beings were born and died before 1900, click here:

    • pjlazos 7:24 am on January 8, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Great post. My favorite is – don’t trust the government. As it happens, I also work for the government.😘

      Liked by 2 people

    • Lisa R. Palmer 8:27 am on January 8, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Your title says it all! Thanks for putting it all into perspective, mistermuse! 😀

      Liked by 1 person

    • Don Frankel 10:48 am on January 8, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      So what you’re saying Muse is life is sort of like Hamlet, everybody dies.

      I also worked for the government and don’t trust them. Especially government statistics. “There are lies, damned lies and statistics.” Some should add “government statistics”. Oh wait I just did.

      Liked by 1 person

      • mistermuse 8:47 am on January 9, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        Don, “everybody dies” is my “theory,” and though that’s not original, I’m speculating that it’s also a conspiracy. I also said that “maybe we will live forever.” I thought of saying “maybe we will live happily ever after” instead of just “forever,” but given the gods’ track record in running this life, that may be wishful thinking for the next life (if any). Hopefully we and the gods can forgive each others wrongdoings and make a fresh (re)start at that tentative point.

        Liked by 1 person

    • arekhill1 6:27 pm on January 11, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Everytime I hear “Everybody dies,” I think to myself, “Wait a minute…I didn’t sign off on that.”

      Liked by 1 person

      • mistermuse 10:26 pm on January 11, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        Nor did I, Ricardo. But then we didn’t sign off on The Donald becoming President, either, so I’m beginning to suspect that Somebody stuck a KICK ME sign on our butts.


    • imafraidoftheuniverse 7:16 am on January 27, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Death and taxes, as they say 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • mistermuse 10:53 am on January 27, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        So far, The Donald has managed to avoid both — at least, no one has seen his death certificate or tax returns, so we can assume both he and his money are safe and sound (or at least, safe).


  • mistermuse 12:01 am on February 15, 2017 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , Greeks, , John Keats, ODE ON A GRECIAN URN, , , , , , Socrates, , ,   


    “Beauty is truth, truth beauty — that is all
    Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.”
    –John Keats, from ODE ON A GRECIAN URN

    On this day in February, 399 BC (according to onthisday.com) occurred the fateful trial of the famed Grecian philosopher Socrates, of whom it is said that he didn’t put anything in writing during his lifetime — or even afterward, for that matter. This might lead one to think he was either paranoid or illiterate. By all odes, however, he was neither — otherwise his life/trial/death-by-hemlock would have earned him no esteem….and in theory, the following quotes attributed to Socrates might have been not only recorded by, but credited to, Plato (as well as others Greek to me):

    Wisdom begins in wonder.

    The unexamined life is not worth living.

    To find yourself, think for yourself.

    By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.

    I am not an Athenian or a Greek, but a citizen of the world.

    But why should Plato and a few of his fellow G(r)eeks get all the credit for handing down what Socrates supposedly said? I may not be quite as ancient as they, but I go back far enough to be able to confide with the utmost confidence that Socrates never denied saying the following:

    Wisdom begins in wonder….and ends the same way.

    There’s no fool like an old fool. (On the other hand, some of us “old fools” prefer to think of ourselves as misanthropically eccentric seniors.)

    It is better to light one candle than to curse the darkness. (Or, you could just pay your electric bill on time.)

    My wife would talk to a wooden Indian. (That’s why I keep a wooden Indian around the house.)

    All’s well that ends well. (Well, I don’t know about that….but I suppose if it was good enough for the doomed Socrates, it’s good enough for the likes of Shakespeare and mistermuse.)




    • linnetmoss 7:33 am on February 15, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      What the long-suffering Socrates actually said about wives, according to Xenophon (Symp. 2.10):
      “If that is your view, Socrates,” asked Antisthenes, “how does it come that you don’t practise what you preach by yourself educating Xanthippe, but live with a wife who is the hardest to get along with of all the women there are—yes, or all that ever were, I suspect, or ever will be?”

      “Because,” he replied, “I observe that men who wish to become expert horsemen do not get the most docile horses but rather those that are high-mettled, believing that if they can manage this kind, they will easily handle any other. My course is similar. Mankind at large is what I wish to deal and associate with; and so I have got her, well assured that if I can endure her, I shall have no difficulty in my relations with all the rest of human kind.”

      These words, in the judgment of the guests, did not go wide of the mark.

      Liked by 3 people

    • Don Frankel 8:20 am on February 15, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      Muse are you saying that Socrates was like Yogi in that he didn’t say all the things people say he said? Or was it just that there was no pen and paper as yet and he didn’t feel like hammering away with a chisel and a piece of stone? He thought it was just to crude.

      Liked by 2 people

    • mistermuse 8:29 am on February 15, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      Thanks, Linnet — I appreciate your very interesting comment.

      From what I’ve read (admittedly limited) of the writings of Plato and Xenophon re Socrates, Plato’s were the more brilliant/less literal, and Xenophon’s the more prosaic….so, assuming that the latter took fewer or no liberties with Socrates’ words, “What the long-suffering Socrates actually said about wives” was indeed on the mark. However, whatever the “By all means, marry” quote lost in translation, length-and-literatim-wise, it apparently captured gist-wise.


    • mistermuse 8:38 am on February 15, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      Don, I think they had papyrus by Socrates’ time, but they definitely didn’t have a Yogi Berra. Too bad, because he was a man for the ages!

      Liked by 1 person

    • arekhill1 12:01 pm on February 15, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      As our nation undergoes this period of fractious foolishness, Sr. Muse, reflect that it was old fools who elected one of their own as our leader.

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 1:33 pm on February 15, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      Apparently, they wanted one of their own kind in the White House, Ricardo (notice I said “they” instead of “old fools” because I disavow guilt by association).


    • Colane Conundrum 4:57 pm on February 18, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      I recall that Socrates called writing “the dead flower of speech.”

      I’m not sure if he was responding to my blog … or maybe he just wasn’t a good gardener?

      In any event, we’re lucky Plato recorded all of Socrates’s wisdom so future humanities students could groan about it in Philosophy 101. I can’t remember quite how they go, but I recall one where Socrates said “Don’t put words in my mouth!” while Plato scribbled away furiously, putting words in his mouth.

      Or something like that. I’m not sure; I didn’t do to well in humanities. Clearly.

      Liked by 2 people

    • mistermuse 5:54 pm on February 18, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      Clearly a Conundrum. I, on the other hand, might be labeled a Punundrum, judging by all the groans my writing seems to induce. It probably has something to do with a prophet being without honor in his own puntry (I know that’s not exactly what Jesus said, but Jesus, give me a break).

      Liked by 2 people

    • literaryeyes 9:10 pm on February 22, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      Good one: Wisdom begins in wonder….and ends the same way. And lots of confuciousness in between.

      Liked by 1 person

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