SMILES AND SHADOWS

“Show me a man who smiles when everything goes wrong — and I’ll show you an idiot.” –Evan Esar

I’m very happy to say I seldom smile, so if I’m an idiot, it’s not because I smile a lot. On the serious side, though, there are of course many ways to show that you’re an idiot — not the least of which is being a Republican (no offense intended if you happen to be a boneheaded GOP devotee). Of course, you don’t have to be a two-faced Republican (although it certainly helps) to be an idiot. As human beings (even including politicians and celebs), we’re all prone to at least occasional idiocy. After all,

I will also admit that there are times (such as during The Great Depression of the 1930s) when it made perfect sense to exhort people to smile through their troubles (like laughing to keep from crying):

Going back even further in time, smiling wasn’t always in fashion. No doubt you’ve noticed that people seldom smiled in olden day portraits or in black and white photographs of the 1800s. Even Leonardo da Vinci’s early 1500s Mona Lisa portrait betrayed but the beatific shadow of a smile.

Of course, there are all kinds of smiles: sincere and insincere, artful and artificial, genuine and disingenuous, forthcoming and forced — speaking of which, this quote seems to make the best of the situation:

“Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.” –W. C. Fields

😀

I’M BACK, JACK (AND JILL)

My recovery from strangulated hernia surgery May 17 has been a bit of a bumpy road, and I’m still not feeling up to snuff (which is tobacco, as in “Tobacco Road,” which shamelessly brings me back to the bumpy road I’m on)….all in service of saying I’m back to posting (on a very limited basis).

I’m under doctor’s orders not to do any heavy lifting (physically), but I also don’t feel like doing any “heavy lifting” mentally, so I’ll limit the rest of this post to a few ROAD songs while I’m on the road to recovery. Take it away, Ray.

We end with WAITING AT THE END OF THE ROAD from the great1929 early talkie HALLELUJAH:

Thanks in advance for any comments you may have, and forgive me if I don’t reply to each individually.

HEALTH ISSUES

I’ve been m.i.a. lately because I dealing with serious medical problems.I don’t feel well enough to go into details, but I just want to let my readers know that I won’t be posting for the foreseeable future, Thanks for your past support.

Take care.

OIL OF SNAKE IS THE PITS

In case you haven’t heard –and, if you didn’t have your eyes wide open, how would you — let me be the first to let you in on a new game show titled SNAKE OIL debuting next season on FOX (the TV network, not the hole, the terrier, or the trot). According to deniable sources, the show’s contestants will be given a convincing sales pitch of unique products “by entrepreneurs, some of whom are showcasing real business ventures, while the others are Snake Oil Salesmen whose products are fake. With the help of guest celebrity advisors [such as, perhaps, Donald Trump — unless he’s too busy appearing on future shows like LIAR, LIAR, PANTS ON FIRE and WITCH-HUNT], contestants must determine which products are real and which are a sham, for a chance to win life-changing money.”

Obviously, this show with its “chance to win life-changing money” pitch is going to be such a major hit that it will send WHEEL OF FORTUNE spinning down to the minor leagues. In fact, it’s a virtual certainty that millions, if not billions, of people will be futilely clamoring to become contestants. Unfortunately, the demand will be so in excess of contestants chosen, that your chances are infantisimal (unless, of course, you’re an infant). Fortunately, friends, I have an in with SNAKE OIL insiders, and for the ridiculously low price of $999,999.99, I can get you on the show. Where else can you have an excellent chance at “life-changing money” for under one million clams? And to prove that this is no shell game, I give you my personal guarantee that I’m on the up-and-up.

So act NOW! This offer isn’t going to be around forever (and neither may I).

P.S. Of course, “clams” is only a figure of speech. Cash is preferred, but I will also accept a private jet and luxury apartment in a civilized country which has no extradition treaty with the U.S.

BIG TALK, SMALL TALK, AFTER ALL TALK

” Before a man speaks, it is always safe to assume that he is a fool; after he speaks, it is seldom necessary to assume.” –H. L. Mencken

Thanks to Donald Trump and preceding prevaricators like Bill Clinton, P. T. Barnum and Charles Ponzi, America has long been a world leader in BIG talkers, most of whom are men (women are — generally speaking — better small talkers, in my humble, if foolhardy, opinion).

Personally, I’m not much of a talker, big or small. I much prefer to write, though I like to listen to people who have something worth saying — as opposed to those who just like to hear themselves talk (speaking of lying politicians, believe it or not).

Enough (written) talk. How about some tunes about talk like this first song, which you may have heard of because….

For those who’d rather not talk about love, this witty ditty is for you:

For those who could do with less talk of any kind, this one may be music to your ears (vocal refrain not until 1:53 into the clip):

What more can I say?

THE END

DO YOU BELIEVE, OR LEAVE BE?

Depending on the context, the above is a rather loaded question, isn’t it — perhaps especially in a religious context, which I’ll touch on later. In a broader sense, it’s almost beyond belief how easily people can be led by the (self-proclaimed) ‘knows’ to believe almost anything. I refer, of course, to such charlatans, snake-oil salesmen, and power-hungry politicians and despots as Trump and Putin, whose model is manifestly Nazi Propaganda Minister Joseph Goebbels’ manifesto that If you repeat a lie often enough, it becomes the truth. Or, as the late British poet and critic Dame Edith Sitwell put it, “The public will believe anything, so long as it is not founded on truth.”

Personally, I long believed in Live and let live (so long as what others do doesn’t hurt me and/or others). I now believe that line is too laid back for our times. Integrity and the moral order are too much in danger in today’s world not to instantly, aggressively, and loudly call out those liars for who they are.

Again personally, as to religious beliefs, over my lifetime I’ve gone from practicing Catholic to ex-Catholic to deist (belief in an impersonal, uninvolved God) to non-believer — by which I don’t mean atheist, because I don’t know there is no God, anymore than I know there IS a God. Does that make me an agnostic by default?

In the beginning, who can foresee where life’s spiritual journey will lead? From the time I was in my late teens, when I went on a retreat to the Trappist Monastery of Gethsemani….

….to (as I sit here) contemplating this Monastery, has been a long, long way to where I almost am now:

THE AGNOSTIC’S MONASTERY
by Martin Kirby

In the Agnostic’s Monastery
The quiet monks at vespers
Chant The Word That Might Be Holy:
Maybe…Maybe…Maybe.
They feast on The Gruel of Hope.
They celebrate The Eucharist of Contingency.
They perform stately dances
Around The Altar of Doubt.
They sing requiems for The Death of Certainty.
They send missionaries with glowing faces
To preach The Conditional Truth,
To proclaim that The Results Are Not All In,
To reveal that The Name of God — is Possibility!

Go to them. Bask in the flickering light of Possibility.
Meet frowning Brother Dubious —
Possibly he may guide you to your cell,
And smiling but silent Brother Rehabilitatus,
The Master of Novices.
(His manual The Last Drop in the Cup
May grow soggy with your tears.)
And if the Jillion Jackstraws of Contingency
Are particularly fortuitous,
You may encounter —
Relatively Reverend Abbott Existentialius,
Generally admired for his gravitas,
Who spent decades face down on the floor of his cell,
Chanting, in proto-spiritual anguish,
Maybe…Maybe…Maybe,
Until he sprang up and proclaimed The Tin Rule:
We Don’t Know What We Don’t Know!

Go to them, as a tender novice.
Be anointed with The Brotherly Glue of Sincerity.
Offer them representative samples of the deeper yearnings
Of What May Pass in a dim light for Your Soul.
They will do what is possible.

I’M NOT THERE YET….BUT I CAN’T STOP THINKING.

LIFE NOTES

“The unexamined life is not worth living.” –Plato

When a person reaches a (un)certain age,
He or she may become something of a sage
And be given to examine what life is all about
(unless, of course, one’s a Trumpish sort of lout).

I have reached that age and then some —
So, upon reflection, thought I’d pen some
Words of wisdom I’ve learned about life….
And what I can’t explain, I’ll ask my wife.

On second thought, I think I’ll leave well enough alone and, as is my custom, turn to the music of my life to deal with the subject under consideration.

THAT’S LIFE has its place as far as it goes, but doesn’t answer the question, What’s life? To address that, I’ll put this on the table:

Well, that philosophy doesn’t exactly bowl me over either, so I’ll end on this hopefully more fruitful note:

INTERNATIONAL JAZZ DAY

“If you have to ask what jazz is, you’ll never know.” –Louis Armstrong

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

April 30 is INTERNATIONAL JAZZ DAY, created by UNESCO to highlight jazz and its role in uniting people around the world. Jazz was created in New Orleans (birthplace of Louis Armstrong) in the late 1800s. I could say The rest is history and leave it at that, because it would take volumes to cover that history, and many such volumes have already been written. So I will simply hope you are someone who can or does dig jazz — especially the classic jazz I favor –and offer a few of my favorite selections.

There is no more fitting place to start than with this masterpiece of classic jazz. According to jazz authority/author Scott Yanow: “West End Blues, Armstrong’s favorite recording of his own playing, features a remarkable opening cadenza, some impressive wordless vocalizing, and a dramatic closing statement. As a whole, it is one of the finest jazz recordings of all time and by itself would have made Armstrong immortal.” It still gives me a thrill every time I hear it:

Armstrong also made an amazing recording of this all-time standard, but let’s go with this rendition by the song’s composer:

When it comes to jazz royalty, no one personifies the station more than Edward Kennedy “Duke” Ellington:

I’ll close with a 1925 song that’s far from sophisticated, and actually sounds archaic by evolving jazz standards….but in terms of “uniting people around the world,” I know of no better title:

I PROPOSE FAIR & SQUARE TO MAKE YOU AWARE MY AIM IS TO PREPARE & SHARE A CARE PACKAGE

As a caring, sharing guy who today has nothing better to post, I thought I’d prepare a package you can peruse of more or less carefully selected quotes and music about CARE. If you couldn’t care less, I forgive you and give you permission to peruse no more. Simply pay a fine of all your money and proceed to the nearest exit, which is at the end of the post so you get your money’s worth.

Thank you for electing to continue. As I was saying before being so rudely interrupted, this post will be a care package in quote-and-music form, but not in that order (that would be putting the quote before the chorus). Let us thus begin with this:

Next is this lament penned in 1921 by the legendary W. C. Handy, known as the “Father of the Blues” for such immortal compositions as ST. LOUIS BLUES and MEMPHIS BLUES:

We conclude the musical portion of the program with a song I may not have included If I Didn’t Care:

We close by giving the post an equal amount of quotes (if not equal time) as the musical numbers:

“If I knew I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself.” –Mickey Mantle

“Take care to get what you like, or you will be forced to like what you get.” –George Bernard Shaw

“God takes care of fools, drunks, and the United States of America.” –Stephen Leacock

Even Stephen, the late Canadian humor writer, wasn’t prescient about the Almighty taking care of America — at least, not forever, for God seems to be falling down on the job lately….if not, you could’ve fooled me.

A TALE OF TWO WOLVES

You may have heard this metaphor:
Be wary a wolf knocking at the door….
But if you should hear your stomach growling,
Beware of where a wolf may soon be howling.

I send the above as a metaphorical smoke signal that coming up later this week is TELL A STORY DAY (April 27), in observance of which I’d like to pass along a story of an old Cherokee teaching his grandson about life:

“A fight is going on inside me. It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil – he is anger, envy, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, prejudice, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.” The old Cherokee paused, then continued, “The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.. The same fight is going on inside you – and inside every other person, too.”

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: “Which wolf will win?”

The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”

I can’t say if the story ends well —
The above teaching is all I have to tell.
The old Cherokee did the best he can do….
The rest (of the test) is up to me and you.