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  • mistermuse 12:01 am on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , Busy Doing Nothing, human behavior, , , party poopers, , , , , , wage slaves, work   

    RETIREMENT TIME 

    Hard as it may be (for me, at least) to fathom, it seems that many people approaching retirement don’t look forward to it because they don’t know what they’ll do with all the time they’ll have when they have no job. That has never struck me as a problem, what with books to be read, writing to be written, learning to be learned (unless you already know everything), trips to plan, music to enjoy, sports to follow, chores to avoid, mislaid items to look for, naps to take, etc….not to mention human behavior forever to be baffled by.

    Believe me, friends, if I had half the time my once-upon-a-time fellow wage slaves assume I have, I would be posting a post almost every day instead of once a week or so (which, I concede, may still be too often for you malcontents and party poopers out there).

    So, how busy am I?

    Oops — how did that clip get there? Fact is, I’m so busy, I don’t even have time to think of more to say about the subject….so I’ll avoid that chore by passing it on to others:

    I have never liked working. To me, a job is an invasion of privacy. –Danny McGoorty

    I’ve crunched the numbers in your retirement account. It’s time to figure out who will be wearing the mask and who will be driving the getaway car. –Unknown financial advisor

    My retirement plan is to get thrown into a minimum security prison in Hawaii. –Julius Sharpe

    I will not retire while I’ve still got my legs and my make-up box. –Bette Davis

    The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off. –Abe Lemons

    I find the biggest trouble with having nothing to do is you can’t tell when you’re done. –Unknown

    As for me, except for an occasional heart attack, I feel as young as I ever did. –Robert Benchley

    I can’t wait to retire so I can get up at 6 a.m. and drive around real slow and make everybody late for work. –Unknown

    What do you call a person who is happy on Monday? Retired. –Unknown

    When a professional golfer retires, what does he retire to? –Evan Esar

    When you retire, you switch bosses — from the one who hired you to the one who married you. –Unknown

    Time’s up. COMING, DEAR!

     

     

     

     
    • obbverse 1:11 am on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      I still am weighed down by the joy(?) of work, so need to dole out my time, of which, there is never enough. I believe retirement will soak up all these drudgery hours wasted at work. Thanks for the light at the end of the tunnel.

      Liked by 3 people

    • calmkate 2:50 am on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      lol retirement is a struggle for the other half who already has a well established routine .. good luck with yours!

      Liked by 1 person

      • mistermuse 8:25 am on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

        Thanks, Kate. Actually I’ve been retired for some time, but I can still use the good luck!

        Liked by 1 person

        • calmkate 6:36 pm on September 25, 2019 Permalink

          lol I thought you must have been … don’t I remember you telling me you were 110?

          Liked by 1 person

        • mistermuse 7:03 pm on September 25, 2019 Permalink

          Some days I feel like I’m 110, Kate — it must have been one of those days when I told you that.

          Like

      • mistermuse 5:18 pm on October 18, 2019 Permalink | Reply

        Kate, I’ve been trying repeatedly to enter a comment on your “Friday Fun – restful” post but it won’t ‘take.’ Sorry to trouble you, but here it is, if you can use it:

        Since I retired, I run from quarrels —
        because I’m resting….on my laurels.

        Liked by 1 person

        • calmkate 6:10 pm on October 18, 2019 Permalink

          just posted it, sorry about those WP gremlins, others have posted comments ok ūüôā

          Liked by 1 person

    • emergingfromthedarknight 3:28 am on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      Having ‘retired’ early due to an injury I can relate to most of those quotes and I love the one on work being an invasion of privacy. I also love it when people ask me. “what do you DO all day?” They have no idea ūüôā The happy fact is the day is free to spend however your heart desires.

      Liked by 3 people

      • mistermuse 8:33 am on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

        You nailed it! When people ask me “what do you DO all day?”, I feel like saying, When you retire, I’ll be more than happy if you to give me all the time you don’t know what to do with.

        Liked by 2 people

    • Ashley 4:31 am on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      Retirement is great! Busy busy busy, doing the things I like, well most of the time! When I was “working” we all used to say “have a great weekend” to each other. Nowadays the weekend lasts for at least 7 days! La la la-la-la-la, la-la, la-la, la la la la la la………
      Great post!

      Liked by 2 people

      • mistermuse 8:37 am on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

        Thanks, Ashley. Among the perks of retirement is that it doesn’t matter what day of the week it is, they’re all the same. Like me, you obviously don’t have a problem with that!

        Liked by 2 people

    • masercot 5:39 am on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      I’m just trying to retire before the sun becomes a red giant and incinerates the Earth… If I live frugally, I think I can manage…

      Liked by 4 people

      • mistermuse 8:40 am on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

        Even with Trump & Friends accelerating the process, you will probably still make it to retirement age. Hang in there!

        Liked by 2 people

    • Carmen 6:25 am on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      Having just retired in June (but having summers off anyway) I must say it’s been great so far! :). Hope your retirement’s been great, too!

      Liked by 2 people

      • mistermuse 8:45 am on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

        Thanks, Carmen. Taking early retirement was the best decision I ever made (except, of course, for getting married, having children, and meeting you online. Keep up the good work….I mean, the good retirement!

        Like

    • Rivergirl 7:41 am on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      With my husband it‚Äôs not a lack of things to do in retirement… it‚Äôs a mixed bag of having a great paying job with wonderful benefits, enjoying the social aspect of working, having a purpose to getting up every day and the simple joy of seeing his TSP ( government version of IRA ) grow. Personally I wish he‚Äôd just chuck it all and relax!

      Liked by 2 people

      • mistermuse 8:51 am on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

        If, and as long as, your hubby loves his job, I don’t blame him. It’s when your job is (or becomes) a pain in the butt that it’s time to bail ASAP.

        Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah, Another Blogger 7:58 am on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      Chores to avoid ‚ÄĒ I am totally on board with that.

      Good essay. See ya.

      Neil S.

      Liked by 2 people

    • D. Wallace Peach 8:39 am on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      I couldn’t agree more. Other than writing, I’m retired, and I’m so busy! As soon as my husband retires we’ll be even busier! Lol. Thanks for the laughs this morning. Great one-liners.

      Liked by 3 people

    • Christie 2:35 pm on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      Thank you for the good laugh!
      I love this one: “I can‚Äôt wait to retire so I can get up at 6 a.m. and drive around real slow and make everybody late for work”
      Enjoy your retirement!
      ūüôā

      Liked by 2 people

    • Rosaliene Bacchus 3:25 pm on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      Love the quote from Abe Lemons: “The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off.” I refuse to retire and have chosen to continue writing until the “headman” says enough. I’m the boss, so I make sure that I enjoy the holidays off and do fun things on my weekend breaks.

      Liked by 2 people

      • mistermuse 7:13 pm on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

        “Boss Bacchus” has a good alliterative ring to it — even better than “Rosaliene the Riveter” which you might have been called back in WW II days (not that you’re anywhere near that old, of course). ūüôā

        Like

    • Elizabeth 5:49 pm on September 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      I love being retired. I only fear that I might flunk the question in the emergency room some day about what day it is. I often have no idea. And I try to forget the answer to who is President.

      Liked by 3 people

    • Infidel753 10:24 pm on September 27, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      I tend to agree with you. It seems to me that most people who think they’ll have nothing to do with their time when they retire must be very lacking in intellectual interests.

      Even if I’d have trouble filling up time occasionally, I don’t see why the preferred alternative would be still engaging in some form of drudgery so onerous that I would never have considered doing it if I didn’t need the money. Even being bored for a while would be preferable. At least it doesn’t sap your energy in the same way.

      Liked by 2 people

      • mistermuse 12:02 am on September 28, 2019 Permalink | Reply

        Another alternative for retirees lacking in intellectual interests, hobbies, or other pursuits would be to volunteer their time with a non-profit organization to help those in need. I would think that making oneself useful to others not only helps others, but would give purpose to one’s own life.

        Liked by 1 person

    • Silver Screenings 6:22 pm on September 28, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      These are great quotes, but the one about the professional golfer retiring made me laugh out loud.

      I’m pleased to hear your retirement seems to be a time of productiveness and fulfillment. ūüôā

      Liked by 1 person

      • mistermuse 7:17 pm on September 28, 2019 Permalink | Reply

        Thank you, SS. Fulfillment is something almost everyone seeks in some form or another, but attaining it in full measure is often dependent on fate and factors beyond our control. I can’t claim ‘full-fillment’– but I’m not complaining (much).

        Liked by 1 person

    • luisa zambrotta 1:01 pm on September 30, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      ūüėČūüėČūü§ó

      Liked by 1 person

    • literaryeyes 11:08 pm on October 1, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      I like all of these. I’d like a day off, I’m busier than ever. I’ve un-retired a lot of things I wanted to do.

      Liked by 2 people

      • mistermuse 11:26 pm on October 1, 2019 Permalink | Reply

        I wish I could un-retire some of the things I wanted to do, but these old bones will no longer cooperate, so they’ll just have to stay retired. No matter — I don’t have time for them anyway (at least, that’s what my head tells me, and my body doesn’t argue….or is it the other way around?).

        Like

    • holliedoc 5:29 am on October 2, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      I started my blog in my retirement, to assist in writing down my thoughts and feelings. Originally I wasn’t sure how much I’d enjoy retirement but have since taken up learning Spanish and playing the guitar amongst other things. It’s amazing how quickly you fill up your time in retirement.

      Liked by 2 people

      • mistermuse 12:53 pm on October 3, 2019 Permalink | Reply

        You’ve got that right! My time is not only filled up, but overflowing.

        Like

    • Kally 10:22 am on October 17, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      This is simply so well written! I love it. May I reblog this out and link it back to your blog please?

      Liked by 1 person

    • Robert Smith 7:16 am on October 22, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      Relatable post! Thanks for sharing such an amazing article.

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 12:54 pm on October 22, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      Thanks, Robert. Sharing is caring, as someone once said (maybe it was me — ha ha).

      Like

    • live an untethered life 7:37 pm on November 30, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      Reblogged this on Live an Untethered Life and commented:
      I don’t intend to go from 60 to 0. I plan to leap over to a new highway and keep or increase my speed!

      Liked by 2 people

    • Paul Hannah 1:52 pm on December 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      Hmmm…I avoided retirement like I avoided kids with snotty noses at the grocery store. When I was finally there I saw a flat, endless plain of nothing-to-do. So just this week I started a blog, Retirement-TheSnarkSide. Now I‚Äôve got something fun to do, once I get the hang of WordPress. Thanks Robert.

      Liked by 5 people

    • mistermuse 4:05 pm on December 25, 2019 Permalink | Reply

      Paul, I’ve been blogging on WordPress for over ten years, and I still don’t get the hang of their shenanigans (see my posts of Dec. 11th and 15th to give you an idea of one of the problems I have with WP). I hope you have more technological expertise than I, otherwise it may not be as much fun as you anticipate. In any case, good luck…..and Merry Christmas/Happy New Year.

      Like

    • holliedoc 6:07 pm on February 17, 2020 Permalink | Reply

      Well if you happen to get time in your retirement, please do have a look at my retirement blog. I’d be keen to hear your thoughts and would welcome any comments on my articles.
      https://itsthetimeofyourlife.com/

      Liked by 1 person

      • mistermuse 6:53 pm on February 17, 2020 Permalink | Reply

        I attempted to leave a comment on your Nov. 25 2019 post, but apparently it didn’t take. I’ll try to give it another try when I have time, but it won’t be today.

        Like

      • mistermuse 12:15 pm on February 18, 2020 Permalink | Reply

        I tried again today to leave a comment on your Nov. 25 post, but again, it apparently didn’t go through. I’m sorry, but I’m not tech-savvy enough to figure out why, and I can’t keep wasting time trying.

        Like

        • holliedoc 5:43 pm on February 18, 2020 Permalink

          Hmm that’s a shame. I wonder why myself. I’ll have a look into why it’s not possible. Many thanks for your reply!

          Liked by 1 person

  • mistermuse 12:01 am on January 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: attitude, , , coping, drudgery, early retirement, human relations, , , jobs, lost souls, unemployment benefits, work   

    TAKE THIS JOB AND CAN IT! 

    And to think that you can turn on the television any hour of any day and find a politician railing against the outsourcing of these manufacturing jobs, as if this is any great loss at all. The outsourcing hasn’t gone nearly far enough if you ask me; we should be outsourcing these factories to the ninth circle of hell, outsourcing them into oblivion! It’s not work fit for a human being….¬† —Franklin Schneider

    * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

    If you think my last post¬†featured jobs that stink —¬†stink again. Franklin Schneider, author of¬†CANNED (subtitled¬†How I Lost Ten Jobs in Ten Years¬†and Learned to Love Unemployment) has held every type of job — briefly. He’s detasseled corn in Iowa,¬†served time at a doomed Internet start-up, and for one shining moment became the “Most Successful Telemarketer in America.” But his search for a fairly compensated, fulfilling position free of pointless drudgery taught him one thing: Such a job does not exist. And if it did, his boss would¬† probably be an a**hole [quoted from back cover].

    CANNED is a book with an attitude¬†you’ll probably¬†either loathe¬†or relate to. As I read it, I¬†found myself¬†doing a bit of¬†both, because, although¬†Schneider tells it like¬†he sees it, I was left feeling — well, more or less like a combination of these reviews/reviewers:

    “For the majority of you reading Canned, a feeling of contempt will wash over you toward the¬†writer for exemplifying the worst in Americans. Others will read these words and show some form of remorse for the author and his ill-conceived notions as to what he is ‘entitled’ [collecting unemployment benefits while deliberately¬†ducking¬†work].¬†In either respect, I am sure that every one who is not a Marxist can agree, Franklin Schneider is the type of person this country can do without.” –Charles Signorile

    “[It’s] a caustic celebration of the loser life, a ranting jeremiad against the working world and all its slavish pieties. It’s like watching Thoreau hand out tokens at the mall arcade, Melville grind his teeth in an Aeron¬†chair at a media portal startup, or Bukowski lose his mind in an MCI telemarketing¬†carrel: a twisted kind of fun.” –Tom Lutz

    “Franklin Schneider’s writing is smart, energetic, funny, illuminating, outrageous, painful (in the best possible way), quirky, distinctive and wildly entertaining.” –Josh Emmons

    *** * * * * * * * * ** * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * ** * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * ***

    I¬†view¬†CANNED in¬†the broader context of¬†a¬†roiling world of differing individuals, groups and classes¬†who can’t put themselves in the other guy’s¬†place,¬†unable (or averse) to consider there may be¬†a happier way to run a steamboat. The late comedienne Joan Rivers¬†put it like this:¬†“Can we talk?” The answer: Apparently not¬†really¬†(unless by “talk,”¬†is meant moving our lips and making sounds).¬†No wonder many of us just¬†don’t¬†“get it.” Sometimes it seems that¬†only kids make allowances.

    Like fellow lost-soul¬†Schneider, I didn’t know what I wanted to do when I was young. Unlike him, I¬†wound up falling into a thirty year career with one company while I “found myself.” It was a career in which¬†I take neither great¬†pride nor lasting¬†prejudice¬†(in other words, I worked to live, not lived to work), from which I was able to retire early¬†and end up doing what I¬†came¬†to¬†want to do. Was it¬†worth putting up with all¬†the¬†“slavish pieties” one must observe along the way? Given the cards¬†we’re dealt, I never felt as if I had a choice.

    It’s easy to¬†envy those who have the good fortune to¬†earn a living doing what they love to do, but even some of¬†them go off the deep end, unable to cope.¬†For the¬†everyone else¬†of us, Franklin Schneider cites this¬†quote: This is how the hero of our time must be. He will be characterized either by decisive inaction, or else by futile activity.* Perhaps so. In any case, I¬†rest his case.

    *from A Hero of Our Time, by Mikhail Lermontov

    P.S. And what was it “I came to want to do?”¬†Well,¬†since¬†you asked:

    http://www.gocomics.com/pearlsbeforeswine/2016/01/24

     

     
    • Midwestern Plant Girl 6:53 am on January 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      I may have to read this book! I work to live right now, but would love to live for work. .. with the right job. I have never been on unemployment b4, but wouldn’t be ashamed to be now. I want to take classes to change careers, but have no time to go while working! Catch 22. ūüėĮ
      I need to change the way I feel about responsibility… why feel guilty about changing jobs when this is my life and I have only a short time to enjoy it!

      Liked by 2 people

    • Don Frankel 9:01 am on January 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      My 25 year career as a Civil Servant was at times exhilarating, challenging, boring, annoying, stressful, boring, fun and did I say boring? But it was, well, life.

      The best thing is to own your own business which I got to do as well. Now, I follow my passion.

      Liked by 1 person

      • mistermuse 10:33 am on January 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        As the pig said in the PEARLS BEFORE SWINE comic strip, “BEING LAZY IS NOT A PASSION!” (Just kidding, Don — I couldn’t resist!) ūüôā

        Like

    • arekhill1 10:36 am on January 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Still working here. Never been on unemployment, disability or workman’s comp in my life. Find time to write, too, in addition to carving out time to sit on the couch and drink beer. How does it all get done? Saving time by skipping personal pronouns helps.

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 11:09 am on January 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Couldn’t have said it better myself.

      Like

    • literaryeyes 12:06 pm on January 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      This is a subject we don’t want to talk about, but many people are stuck in drudgery, and even worse, what they do has no lasting positive value. Most know it, but it’s easier to say, I’m doing it for my family, and I’ll “live” outside work. I love that you quoted Lermontov’s A Hero of our Time (some say a precursor to The Stranger); he was WAY ahead of his time. Worthwhile occupation may not bring you the same monetary compensation, but what is your sanity worth? I made little money doing what I believed was helpful to others, and in the process have a wealth of experience (if I modestly may say so!).

      Liked by 1 person

    • Michaeline Montezinos 12:16 pm on January 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Worked and or went to school from the age of 6. Schooling is work where you can only learn what your professor teaches. Finally had time to sit on the couch with my fourth daughter and loved every messy minute spent having babies and watching them grow. Not sure if marriage falls into any one of these categories . Maybe it has a passionate beginning and then the work begins. But it is a career you must want to pursue without selfishness and with devotion to responsibility. So I finally married the man who inspires me to do both.

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 1:05 pm on January 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      I can think of no job more important than being a stay-at-home mom (or dad, for that matter), but of course, that depends on the family financial situation and requirements (which shouldn’t put acquiring luxuries ahead of giving one’s kids the love, time and attention they need).

      Like

    • Todd Duffey Writes on Things 6:21 pm on January 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Hear hear! I’ve been an actor in cult films and TV shows, and yet I’ve also been on the government teat. If you’ve ever found something you absolutely love to do, nothing else will bring you the satisfaction of that thing. To those who haven’t found it, the point is moot. To those who have, they tax us for just such the occasion that, should we need it, it is there. Not to live off of. Simply to get us to the next opportunity.

      Liked by 1 person

      • mistermuse 9:34 pm on January 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        Wouldn’t it be heaven if everyone could earn a living doing what they love to do, whether it be digging ditches, writing the Great American or Great Armenian Novel, or sitting on the couch drinking beer (preferably craft beer). With all the promises politicians make, I don’t know why no candidate has promised that.

        Liked by 1 person

    • moorezart 6:27 pm on January 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Reblogged this on From 1 Blogger 2 Another.

      Liked by 1 person

  • mistermuse 12:05 am on January 20, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , , Mount Ararat, Noah, , , , , work   

    OH, WHAT A RELIEF IT IS 

    Life is just a dirty four-letter word: w-o-r-k.¬† –J. P. McEvoy, writer/comic strip creator

    • * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * ** * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

    If you have a job that stinks because your caseload is overwhelming (like maybe social work, child welfare or criminal court), you can probably relate to this:

    http://thinkprogress.org/justice/2016/01/09/3737789/ohio-judge-poem-mocks-inmate/

    If I’m any judge,¬†that’s a¬†Judge (and fellow Ohioan)¬†who knows how to do creative “sentencing” — a Cain who is able, as Judge Cain himself might pun. As a poet, I¬†see poetry¬†as a way to express myself creatively, but¬†the above case demonstrates¬†that poetry¬†is also good¬†for¬†getting a load off one’s mind. Take those times I’m on¬†the¬†throne, dumping a¬†commodious b. m. — I’d¬†liken it to¬†killing two turds with one stone,¬†because at times,¬†it may be¬†the only place¬†I find¬†peace and quiet to¬†compose¬†the poems I¬†post….such as this com-post:

    THE REAL POOP BEHIND THE FLOOD

    Noah did build a mighty ark;
    He worked by day and he worked by dark.

    From lands afar he gathered pairs
    Of kangaroos and polar bears,

    Of groundhogs and water buffalo,
    And every creature, bound to go

    With him o’er deserts, swamps and seas,
    Across the Alps and Pyrenees,

    Taking those beasties from where they were at,
    Straight to his ark for a cruise to Mount Ararat,

    Got them on board, two of each species,
    Ere long to amass a mess of feces,

    And though the elephants brought their trunks,
    Two hoses could but horse with a stench like skunks.

    Fortunately, as much as decks stinked,
    Dinosaurs and mastodons had become extinct.

    But how do we know Noah knew their gender?
    The pairs¬†multiplied like rabbits by THE ENDer….

     
    • Michaeline Montezinos 12:47 am on January 20, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Although I have not composed a poem when on the pot, I have to admire someone who has done it a lot. Unless I’m wrong and this was only one occurrence, I hope you face the throne with calm assurance. Very witty and punny poem mistermuse.. Thanks for enlighterning us about the critters on the Ark. I can picture Noah’s family and friends itching to find land after days parked on that hill with the stench growing stronger still .

      Liked by 1 person

      • mistermuse 8:28 am on January 20, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        For my poem to have inspired you to such eloquence, Michaeline, I can truly rest assured that my hard work on the throne was worth the effort. In fact, I think your rhyme is so sublime that you should run for Judge there in Florida and (as an ex-Ohioan) show Floridians how we put criminals — not to mention stool pigeons — in their place.

        Like

    • ladysighs 6:18 am on January 20, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      LOL

      Liked by 1 person

    • arekhill1 11:22 am on January 20, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      That judge is hard on your heels for the title of Poop Poet Laureate of your Midwestern state, Sr. Muse.

      Like

    • mistermuse 1:45 pm on January 20, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Hopefully, as long as the judge keeps his day job on the bench and I keep my play job on the throne, I will remain Poop Poet Prince. I could say more, but that’s the long and shit of it, Ricardo.

      Like

      • Michaeline Montezinos 3:29 pm on January 20, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        Once you get going, Mister Muse, with the “Princely potty” jokes, you start to “roll.” Its okay with me as long ” you enjoy the go .” Those Charmin Bears on the television, which you said you did not always watch, are usually exclaiming how tidy, soft and complete their toilet tissue has been with their running to the “John.” Whomever John is I pity him. Mama Charmin Bear must make a lot of chili. I think she uses “kidney” beans. That explains the “running” and the copious supply of Charmin in her cupboard. I hope this mono log” has not discouraged you. After all is said and “done” you can also read newspaper. At the condo Where we lived before Florida, I discovered why our news paper disappeared before could go down stairs to retrieve it.

        Like

    • mistermuse 6:08 pm on January 20, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      I don’t remember saying anything about Charmin Bears, Michaeline — in fact, I bear-ly remember them on television at all. But I do think newspapers can serve as more than reading material – at least, that’s what I advise my wife when she tells me we’re running low on toilet paper. ūüôā

      Like

      • Michaeline Montezinos 6:43 pm on January 20, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        I write so much that my computer “freezes.” Then I cannot finish or proofread what I wrote. That is a “bum”mer,. “Butt” at least I got the main idea of “what I was trying to get out.” Oh My! Now I can’t stop with the potty jokes and puns. Help! I am sinking into the doo doo of my life’s S##T Hole. I’ve gone from naughty to not nice. Sorry, mistermuse and others here on this web site. Me BAD !

        Liked by 1 person

    • Don Frankel 6:48 pm on January 20, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      We’ve always been told that it all comes out in the end but now I have to wonder… does it?

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 8:41 pm on January 20, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      It has been said that a pun is the lowest form of humor, which makes sense, if it all comes out in the end. But I agree with Oscar Levant, who said a pun is the lowest form of humor — when you didn’t think of it first.

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    • mistermuse 8:26 am on January 21, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      He was also an excellent pianist (and good friend of George Gershwin – I have an old 78 rpm record album of him playing Gershwin’s RHAPSODY IN BLUE).

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      • Michaeline Montezinos 7:41 pm on January 22, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        When TCM has the movie about George Gershwin’s life, I watch it not so much for the acting. I love the music and like the tile of this movie RHAPSODY IN BLUE. I wait until the actor plays the title song and I can feel the sidewalks of New York, and see the bridges that span the Hudson River. I do not own any of the record but I do enjoy the magic of Gershwin’s songs.

        Liked by 1 person

    • BroadBlogs 5:58 pm on January 22, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Clever.

      I had never thought about this before, but good question: But how do we know Noah knew their gender?

      Liked by 1 person

    • hooklineandinkwell 10:56 am on January 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Brilliantly penned. I find the throne to be the quietest place where poet and thoughts assemble to flush the crap of the day away and out of it draw a breath of creativity. ūüôā

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 11:52 am on January 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Thank you. I hope you’ve never had to write any “Dear John” letters on the throne. ūüôā

      Like

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