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  • mistermuse 10:00 am on April 1, 2018 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: April Fool's Day, , dirty words, , , ,   


    Today being April Fools’ Day, and April being National Humor Month, I thought I’d write a funny post. The problem is that I’m having problems writing a funny post. Either the jokes I find are losers, or I don’t ‘get’ them (obviously, if I don’t get them, they can’t be funny), or they contain one or more of the seven words you can’t say on television (or mention on a family blog) — you remember, the 7 words comedian George Carlin warned us about back in the 70s:

    Of course, you would hear every one of those words if you watched the above clip, so I can’t use it.

    And then I thought about using this clip,


    So, I can’t use it.

    Finally, out of desperation, I thought I’d call my neighbors, the Funnies, but they were out of desperation too. However, they did let me borrow yesterday’s newspaper containing these cartoons:


    Now that, I can use.

    • Carmen 10:29 am on April 1, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Mister MUSE!! Such irreverent humour for April Fool’s Day!! Atta boy!! Big grin. . .. I haven’t heard that one by George Carlin for awhile and I was hooting!
      I’m so glad you’re watching those dingleberries. . . 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

      • mistermuse 11:09 am on April 1, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        That reminds me that after I called the Funnies, I should’ve called my neighbors on the other side, the Dingleberries. But it’s just as well I didn’t — after all, the Dingleberries ARE dingleberries, and I might have given their suggestions the raspberries.

        Liked by 2 people

      • mistermuse 2:29 pm on April 1, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        Thanks. As long as we’re being multi-dimensional, why settle for “Seeing three dimensions in two dimensions” when you can see three dimensions PLUS two dimensions:

        Liked by 1 person

    • arekhill1 2:41 pm on April 1, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Happy Easter, Sr. Muse. And April Fool’s Day. And National Humor Month. And Sexual Assault Awareness Month, proclaimed by the Sexual Assaulter-in-Chief.

      Liked by 4 people

      • mistermuse 4:09 pm on April 1, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        Not to mention the Golden Rule Assaulter-in-Chief and Intelligence Assaulter-in-Chief. But on Easter Sunday, we should dwell on good eggs, so enough about him and Happy Easter to you too, Ricardo.


    • Garfield Hug 9:18 am on April 2, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      🤣🤣🤣You did it!

      Liked by 1 person

    • Don Frankel 1:27 pm on April 2, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      I think it is funny McGee. I actually saw George Carlin live once in Vegas, funny, very funny. When it comes to blue routines as they used to call them this guy is my favorite.

      Liked by 1 person

      • mistermuse 3:27 pm on April 2, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        LMAO at that clip, Don.

        BTW, did you catch who that is in the B & W “Tain’t funny” clip? They’re Jim & Marian Jordan (better known as FIBBER McGEE & MOLLY, from the long-running — 1935-56 — radio show of the same name). They also made four movies (that two-second clip is undoubtedly from one of them).


    • Don Frankel 9:38 pm on April 2, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Muse, while I didn’t recognize them I was pretty sure they were from the radio show. I do remember that line.

      Liked by 2 people

    • kutukamus 2:29 am on April 10, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      The music of the Trump cartoon is good, and many thanks for the 7 no-no words! 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

      • mistermuse 10:17 am on April 10, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        That’s funny, I didn’t hear any music with the Trump cartoons — then I turned the sound on 🙂 and I still didn’t hear any….not even songbirds tweeting like crazy, like Trump. But there SHOULD be music — music with lyrics using the 7 no-no words which are probably coming from the bedroom Trump can’t enter.

        P.S. Thanks for the thanks.

        Liked by 1 person

        • kutukamus 5:53 pm on April 10, 2018 Permalink

          Just checked. Strange. The music is still there (when I play the “Varvel: Drawing Trump non-disclosures” cartoon), a fun contrast to the character depicted. Then again, a version with Carlin’s 7 no-nos from behind the door sounds all the more exciting 🙂

          Liked by 1 person

  • mistermuse 9:42 am on April 1, 2015 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , Annie Dillard, April Fool's Day, , , , , , Peter O'Toole, ,   




    • * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

    Although not an atheist myself, I believe they exist, and I’m not above quoting them….and what better day to do so than April Fool’s Day, a day of dubious origin and God-awful jokes? So, without further a-Dieu, I bring you the word(s) of Godless mortals:

    I have too much respect for the idea of God to make it responsible for such an absurd world. -Georges Duhamel

    When one person suffers from a delusion, it is called insanity. When many people suffer from a delusion, it is called Religion. -Robert M. Pirsig

    I once wanted to become an atheist but I gave up — they have no holidays. -Henny Youngman

    If absolute power corrupts absolutely, where does that leave God? -George Deacon

    Eskimo: If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell?
    Missionary: No, not if you didn’t know.
    Eskimo: Then why did you tell me?
    -Annie Dillard

    I admire anyone who’s genuinely trying to achieve spiritual enlightenment and live a peaceful life. But religious dogma is a barrier to that. The last thing a dogmatist wants is for anyone to be enlightened, any more than a pharmaceutical company wants anyone cured. -Pat Condell

    When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself. –Peter O’Toole

    Christianity, as many religions, was just dreamed up by a couple people with really good imaginations, a lot of time on their hands, and even some “herbal” help. I mean, who would dream up half of that crap without being totally baked? -Jillian A. Spencer

    Puritanism, n. The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy. -Ambrose Bierce

    There ain’t no answer. There ain’t going to be any answer. There never has been an answer. That’s the answer. -Gertrude Stein (when asked about God)

    Oh, well. We’ll always have Paris.




    • arekhill1 9:54 am on April 1, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      I’ve proposed Darwin Day as an atheist holiday for many years now, Sr. Muse, but so far a groundswell of popular support for the idea has failed to materialize. Coincidentally, my meditation tomorrow will be on the power of prayer.


    • mistermuse 10:24 am on April 1, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Although Darwin was at one time a deist and later an agnostic, there seems to be some dispute as to whether he died an atheist. So why not make Darwin Day a holiday for believers in any of that holy trinity? I’m up for it.


    • Michaeline Montezinos 1:15 am on April 2, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      To correct an earlier commentary, I do believe in a God who is a Creator. And I think that Christianity, among many other pagan and non pagan (how do we tell the difference?) religions was built upon the major earthly and atronomical events. Like the Vernal Equinox which heralds the arrival of Spring. Thus we have Easter and Passover. Both are a celebration of overcoming the fear of mortal death.

      The idea of a Darwin Day makes more sense to me than Christmas, Mid Summer’s Eve and Easter combined. I vote we incorporate it into the calendar.


    • mistermuse 7:03 am on April 2, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      I “tried” Christianity once upon a time, but (to paraphrase my little poem at the top of the post), “Never again.” To quote the late journalist Herb Caen, “Born again Christians are an even bigger pain the second time around.”


    • Don Frankel 9:27 am on April 2, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      “I remember it well. The Germans wore gray. You wore blue.”


    • mistermuse 9:55 am on April 2, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Don, thanks for remembering it well. Actually two movies brought my post’s closing line (We’ll always have Paris”) to my mind: not only CASABLANCA, but also MIDNIGHT IN PARIS, the Woody Allen film in which one of the characters in 1920s Paris is Gertrude Stein (who lived most of her life in Paris and provided the last of the post’s ten quotes).


    • BroadBlogs 1:27 pm on April 3, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Some great quotes. My philosophy is to do what works for you. If you feel you’re happier and healthier not believing, do that. If you are feel you’re happier and healthier believing, do that.

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 2:03 pm on April 3, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Sounds like a good philosophy to me, though for some, I think it’s more a matter of coming to a rational conclusion rather than what makes them feel happier and healthier. In other words, they have no choice but to accept wherever the search for “truth” has led them.


    • Mélanie 1:53 am on April 4, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      I do NOT believe in atheists, but in… myself! I do respect all believers as long as they respect me… 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 5:25 am on April 4, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      As a deist,
      the leist
      I can do
      is respect you.


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