A ST. NICHOLAS DAY THOUGHT

It’s only (almost) Dec. 6, St. Nicholas Day, but we’ve already received several Christmas cards at our house, including one with a “generic” Christmas letter enclosed. If past be prelude, that was but the first of quite a few such “catch up” letters, which are welcomed by Mrs. Muse and not unwelcomed by Mr. Muse, understanding that who has time to write individualized holiday missives (though that would be nice) to dozens of friends and relatives?

Thus, we bow to the same exigency, with she doing the initial writing and me doing the editing, which often consumes as much time as the writing, because I don’t take such tasks lightly. This has me thinking, why should we start from scratch every holiday season? It would save both of us a lot of bother to come up with the mother of all generic Christmas letters and be done with it — a glorified form letter, if you will, which would serve the purpose every year, with perhaps a blank space or two here and there to fill in, if one wishes to be specific about something that happened during the year, such as:

As you may or may not know, (namedied of (diseasein (month). At least, we assume (name) died, because they buried the old fart.

Need I add, heed should be taken not to send same to the immediate family of the (assumed) deceased, which shouldn’t be a problem, as there are always a few Christmas cards you set aside where you just write a few words without enclosing a letter.

Of course, no Christmas letter would be complete without recounting your vacation and/or travels during the year. Unfortunately, Mr. & Mrs. Muse don’t get around much any more, so we may have to embellish slightly our trip to the Amish farm market an hour’s drive away:

This past summer, we ventured to an agrestal land of bearded men and oddly dressed women whose rustic appearance spoke of a time before civilization came to be. We nonetheless managed to befriend them by giving green paper in exchange for some of the fruits (and vegetables) of their labors. However, as we were leaving, a strange-looking, horned animal took an interest in our bounty and began chasing us. Fortunately, we barely beat the ferocious beast back to our car and escaped with our lives.

Happy holidays.

  

 

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11 comments on “A ST. NICHOLAS DAY THOUGHT

  1. arekhill1 says:

    Is the old goat in your story symbolic, or did you actually need to escape from a caprine attacker?

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  2. Don Frankel says:

    I get it. Instead of the two of you getting taken in by the snake you are running away from an old people who sold you the apple and an old goat who’s trying to eat it. The potential allegories abound. Or is it elegies? You know I didn’t get any religious education.

    Anyway you knew this was coming as soon as you mentioned it. It was only a matter of who. Or is it whom?

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  3. mistermuse says:

    Don, I knew if anyone would catch my “Don’t Get Around Much Anymore” mention, it would be you. Unfortunately, when I click your link, I get “This video does not exist.” So let’s try this:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xBAbXH0JVWE

    Like

  4. ladysighs says:

    I notice now the Like Button is missing. 😦 So forced to comment. I don’t do many comments on your blog because the only reason for comments is to prove I can write something cleverer than what you wrote in the blog entry. Never happen on your blog. 🙂
    Yes, the yearly Xmas letters are starting. 😦 I think one friend just recycles the same letter every year. How many trips around the world can one make? And it isn’t even a friend sending the letter. It is an acquaintance of an acquaintance.

    Like

    • ladysighs says:

      I just noticed……..several hours later………the LIKE button is here. 🙂

      Like

      • mistermuse says:

        Thanks for the comment(s). The Like button is still missing, at least on my screen. I don’t know if WordPress did it or the butler did it (or maybe I did something inadvertently to make it disappear). I’m not computer-savvy enough to solve the mystery, so I’ll be looking for help. HELP!!!

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  5. mistermuse and Don Frankel, your blog and Don’s comment have cause me to look up 4 new words in the dictionary. Good to do as I like to improve my vocabulary. However, Don, You must be thinking April Fool’s Day instead ofthe yearly holida letter. I did try the video of Nat King Cole singing “Don’t Get Around Any More.” Muse did post another link to that song. Thanks and I wil listen soon. I will listen to that voice singing my tune now as I am often stuck here at home.
    I did get a few holiday letters over the years. They are nice to receive from friends but I feel the urge to write one back. That upsets me since I am not proficient at that sort of commentary. I would end up writing a letter instead of just signing our names.
    Also, I used to get about 30 + cards for the season from family and folks I thought were friends. The number has dwindeled down to a precious few, thankfully. My hands can only write so much before Mr. Arthritis conquers my ability. Last year I only got about 9 cards and I think it silly and wasteful to buy a whole box of holidays cards that all are the same. Much like copying the Xmas letter without the printer. I did hand write one letter and tried to insert each name in the “Dear So and So” blank but ending up changing the details in the letter. That was a Humbug moment and a waste of time. Calling old farts and hags like me and mine. Do not waste your time; just use the dozen free cards I get every year from my charity and be done with it. Ho! Ho! Ho!

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  6. mistermuse says:

    As you may have discovered by now, Michaeline, my link to “Don’t Get Around Much Anymore” is not by Nat King Cole, but by the Ink Spots, my favorite vocal group of the late 1930s-early 40s. Music trivia buffs of that era may be interested to know that the song was composed by Duke Ellington as “Never no Lament.” Lyricist Bob Russell later added words and it became a big hit in 1942 as “Don’t Get Around Much Anymore.”

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  7. literaryeyes says:

    You are much more patient than I with these letters. We get one every year from a relative who apparently has the most exciting anf HAPPY life. It makes me wonder what she’s imbibing or smoking. And can she send me some for Christmas? Grinchly, MC

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  8. mistermuse says:

    If it were up to me, at our age, we’d give up sending an annual Christmas letter. But Mrs. Muse has a lot more relatives than I, so that’s that….and as long as it’s gotta go, it might as well go not smelling like crap (if you’ll pardon the expression).

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