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  • mistermuse 12:00 am on August 13, 2018 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , , Michael Avenatti, , , , Stormy Daniels, , The White House, voting   

    WE’RE ALL HUMAN (EVEN REPUBLICANS) 

    For those who pay little attention to American politics, the name of attorney Michael Avenatti may be unfamiliar, but most of you have no doubt heard of his famous client, the porn star and ex-Trump hookup, Stormy Daniels. I bring Avenatti up because I have often wondered why Democrats don’t more vehemently challenge GOP complicity when President Bully Boy acts as if the country were his own personal fiefdom to ru(i)n as he damn well pleases. On August 10, Avenatti addressed that very question:

    Now, I fully recognize that the Republican faithful (at least, a fair number of them) are human and, as such, susceptible to being sold a bill of goods and/or being evangelized by a vainglorious pied piper. As an ex-Catholic, I know what it’s like to be vulnerable to vested interests in positions of authority. They seem to have all the answers at a time answers are hard to come by, but you haven’t yet grown to realize that, to those who claim to have the answers, you are part of their agenda, another recruit to their cause/beliefs. Easy pickings.

    So, while I can empathize with being gullible (because I’ve been there, done that), there is a bigger issue at stake here, and that is what kind of country are we becoming? When will it prove too late to undo the divisiveness, to blue pencil the Orange Man who debases the dark place that was once The White House? What in the name of civility and integrity has become of our standards of leadership?

    America has never been “a perfect union”–far from it–but in a world where almost everything is relative, we are at a new low in my lifetime. For all the faults and failings of past Presidents, has there ever been one so self-obsessed, so megalomaniacal, so utterly incapable of reflection and putting himself in the place of those who come from a different place (both literally and figuratively)?

    I started this post intending to intersperse some humor into a sober matter, but despite all the Trump satire and jokes that serve as a sort of laugh-to-keep-from-crying palliative (I plead guilty to occasionally getting in on the relief act), there’s really nothing funny about this President in the long run. At the end of the day, the joke is on us….and we brought it on ourselves. Now it’s up to us–we, the voters–to get serious about an act of contrition.

    November 6, 2018 would be a good time to start.

     
    • leggypeggy 12:53 am on August 13, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Excellent post. Bring on November.

      Liked by 4 people

    • Paul Sunstone 3:16 am on August 13, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      “we are at a new low in my lifetime”. I agree, MM — worse one in my lifetime. Trump’s election has done in my faith in the American system. I will not be content until we eliminate the electoral college and have at last directly elected presidents.

      There are so many ways in which he is wrong for this country that it’s overwhelming just to think about all the ways.

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts about the cheeto in chief.

      Liked by 5 people

      • mistermuse 9:04 am on August 13, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        “overwhelming just to think about all the ways” — you nailed it, Paul. Trump is such a nonstop narcissist, flimflam man, dissembler, panderer to his base, outright liar, white collar thug, unseeing hypocrite, braggart, bully, and amoral prevaricator (what am I missing?) that one is hard-pressed to know how to cope with it all. No wonder the Republicans want Robert Mueller to wrap up his investigation ‘yesterday’ because the longer it goes, the more endless the trail of deceit Trump leaves behind.

        Liked by 4 people

        • Paul Sunstone 11:26 am on August 13, 2018 Permalink

          I worry something is going to happen to get him reelected. A terrorist attack, maybe. Everyone rallying around him.

          Liked by 3 people

    • Lisa R. Palmer 10:11 am on August 13, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      You are both going to hate me (mistermuse and Paul), when I tell you I’m starting to go “soft” on Trump. But let me explain why…

      I realized recently that for all his faults, lies, scams, etc., Trump showed his true colors PRIOR to being elected. What he’s done while in office was sadly predictable, which is why I was struck with such mind-numbing shock when he was elected. I didn’t vote for him, but neither could I vote for Clinton – also corrupt, shady, elitist, etc… I voted for Jill Stein. And while I realize people blame people like me for handing the election to Trump, I disagree. I voted my conscience, and I feel no regret. If more would do that, perhaps a less corrupt government could be created, instead of playing strategy games between two opposing evils…

      But, here’s the thing. I’ve known for most of my life (being a Watergate kid) that the government was corrupt. And, like most Americans, I’ve been willing to turn away from such corruption, to ignore it, so long as it isn’t “in my face,” or interfering with my ability to “get by” on a daily basis. Same with social corruption and injustice. Yes, I rail against it, do my best to be inclusive, fair-minded, and compassionate. But I have not OWNED the “crimes” against others as my personal responsibility. So long as I was “living right,” I was doing my part, right?

      What Trump has shown me, personally, is that this “blind eye” approach IS the problem. That allowing such corruption to exist, and flourish, is MY responsibility. To allow such social injustice to continue “behind the scenes,” so long as I didn’t contribute and it didn’t touch me, was MY irresponsibility and selfishness at play…

      The Trump era has thrown all of that into the spotlight, and made me realize that I AM partly responsible for the mess we find ourselves in. As one of my “others” recently drove home to me: “it may not be YOUR fault, but it is definitely YOUR problem. Deal with it…”

      Besides, I’m absolutely terrified of Pence and his threatened Theocracy…

      Liked by 3 people

      • Paul Sunstone 11:30 am on August 13, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        I’ll take Trump over Pence any day.

        I agree — regardless of blame, it’s our problem. We suffer for it.

        Liked by 3 people

      • mistermuse 12:06 pm on August 13, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        Lisa, 2016 was definitely a ‘lesser of two evils’ Presidential election (the worst choice of major party candidates in memory) — I believe that Hillary was the lesser of two evils and that the country would be in a better place right now if she had been elected. So, I respect your thinking (as evidenced by the last 3 sentences of my post); but just as we “can’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good” (because there’s no such thing as perfect in politics), we shouldn’t (have) let ‘the lesser evil (Clinton) be the enemy of the worse evil (Trump).’ The choices were what they were.

        BTW, I share your concern about Pence, but again I raise the point, who is the lesser evil: Pence or Trump? Perhaps a much closer call than Hillary or Trump, but I think a “threatened Theocracy” is a much less muddled battle than what we have to deal with in Trump’s case.

        Liked by 1 person

        • Lisa R. Palmer 2:06 am on August 14, 2018 Permalink

          I understand what you’re saying, and the me I was two years ago would have agreed unhesitatingly. But I’ve changed my stance since then. Certainly, had Hillary won, things would likely have seemed better, if for no other reason than most of the corruption would still be hidden behind closed doors, and much of the social injustice would be buried beneath the mantle of political correctness. All of that is gone now, in part because of Trump’s outrageous, outlandish and unforgivable behavior. We, as a nation, are being exposed on a daily basis for the villians we always were, but could pretend we weren’t.

          I find Trump to be the lesser evil, though, when compared to Pence, and the rest of the GOP. If nothing else, the whole world can see that he’s insane, whereas Pence and his buddies would prefer a quieter approach to taking apart our country. And with deeply embedded memories of how the Catholic Church once ruled Europe, I have no desire whatsoever to face such a theocracy here. In fact, it frightens me deeply. The exposure of the “Christian jihadists” (the extremist right) under Trump has shown me just how radicalized they are, and how far they’re willing to go to advance their agenda. Against that, I truly would feel powerless…

          Liked by 1 person

        • mistermuse 6:35 am on August 14, 2018 Permalink

          I really can’t disagree with much of what you say, Lisa–especially about this “nation” being duplicitous ever since before it was a nation, ruthlessly deceiving, exploiting and displacing/killing any Native Americans who ‘dared’ to be in their way. Much of the social injustice is, and has been, hidden in plain sight–it’s just that too many Americans throughout history put blinders on and refuse to see it.

          As for Pence, this ex-Catholic (me) thinks (as I said in my reply to Richard Cahill’s comment) that any threatened theocracy will be kept at bay IF Democrats win control of Congress in November. Therefore, I believe it’s more important (for our children’s sake, if nothing else) to rid the country of “Trump’s outrageous, outlandish and unforgivable behavior,” because if people can’t relate to each other in a civil (if not understanding) manner, we’re left with Trump’s behavior as the new normal.

          Liked by 1 person

        • mlrover 5:19 pm on August 15, 2018 Permalink

          Pence tried to push through his religious agenda in Indiana, a die-hard Republican and Bible belt bastion, and lost. His forcing his belief system did not go over well, even though many in the state agree with his opinions. I never voted for him, and as a Christian, am not a fan of Tea Party style evangelical hypocrisy. (Scripturally speaking, neither was Christ.) That said, as much as he gives others the creeps, as President, Pence could do damage because he has motivation. As least Trump is so self-involved and lazy he hasn’t blown us up. Yet. He’s also a coward. My sisters and I agree that the White House will have to be fumigated after he’s gone.

          Liked by 2 people

    • Richard Cahill 11:41 am on August 13, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Trump loses big in 2020, resigns the day after the election, tweeting about how fabulous his Presidency has been and blaming his loss on CNN. Pence is grateful to hold an office he’ll never be elected to for two months and pardons Trump, but doesn’t have the juice to install a temporary theocracy. My prediction.

      Liked by 2 people

      • mistermuse 12:18 pm on August 13, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        Correct me if I’m wrong, but if Democrats take control of Congress (as predicted) in the November election, there’s no way anything resembling a theocracy is going to go through, no matter how much a President Pence might push it. That’s just one more reason why the Nov. 6 election is a “must vote.”

        Liked by 2 people

        • mistermuse 5:55 pm on August 15, 2018 Permalink

          I appreciate your comment, mirover. Though I live in Ohio (next door to Indiana), I didn’t know (or forgot) that Pence “tried to push through his religious agenda” there. But it doesn’t surprise me.

          Like

    • thelonelyauthorblog 12:20 pm on August 13, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Great post. I would like to add, some of us are more human than others.

      Liked by 1 person

    • jonolan 1:12 pm on August 13, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      All you are doing is proving that the American people – we voted for President Trump – were right in our choice and in thoughts about what your kind actually are.

      We going to make America great again. It’s up to you all to either get on board with that or accept whatever consequences American patriots subject you too.

      Like

      • mistermuse 2:42 pm on August 13, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        Did you say that with a straight face, or are you just trying to get a rise out of me?

        Like

        • jonolan 2:46 pm on August 13, 2018 Permalink

          Oh, it was in all sincerity. We’re sick of your hate being aimed at us, our nation, our culture, and the POTUS we elected. We’re not going to let you get in our way any more and we’re sure as Hell not going care about how we hurt your feelings or prospects in life in the course of making America great again.

          Like

        • mistermuse 2:48 pm on August 13, 2018 Permalink

          As if you ever did care.

          Liked by 1 person

      • rawgod 12:54 am on May 13, 2019 Permalink | Reply

        Dear jo, so what are mistermuse’s kind? And what are their thoughts? If you are going to accuse someone of something, spell it out!

        And who is the “we” who are going to make a never-great country great “again”? I take it you think it was great of the Europeans to nearly commit genocide on the people of the Americas who were here before them. Smallpox blankets, rotten meat, alcohol, bullets vs arrows, unarable land for reservations, water so dirty it is undrinkable! You are proud of that? I’m not surprised, but neither will I be surprised when the Russians or Chinese decide to walk over your nation when it is so divided it cannot defend itself. That’s when you will be begging the Democrats and Social Justice Warriors for their help to save you from the bad guys.

        Liked by 1 person

    • restlessjo 2:25 pm on August 13, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Just a holy mess all round, the political situation. Not sure who I feel sorrier for- you, us or the planet 😦 😦

      Liked by 2 people

    • barkinginthedark 6:59 pm on August 31, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      you are far more generous than i re Republicans. as far as i can see they are the source of all that is bad in our country. they voted against social security, the new deal, fair deal, healthcare, busted unions, they gerrymander and deny people their right to vote…and now stand in lock step behind a monster.

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 11:19 pm on August 31, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Couldn’t agree more re almost all Republican politicians. I am a bit more generous re the ‘laity,’ as I don’t think most of them are deliberately perverse — they’re just not sophisticated thinkers (for lack of a better term) and are too easily taken in (“susceptible to being sold a bill of goods,” as I put it in my post).

      Like

    • barkinginthedark 10:29 pm on September 4, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      “November 6, 2018 would be a good time to start” indeed…everything is at stake. VOTE! continue… .

      Liked by 1 person

    • barkinginthedark 11:04 pm on February 5, 2020 Permalink | Reply

      In light of this sham impeachment “trial” now we can be all but certain: Republicans are purely self-righteous hypocrites concerned only with power, and greed…aside from being traitorous cowardly toadies.. continue…

      Liked by 1 person

  • mistermuse 8:08 am on July 27, 2017 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , , , , , voting   

    POLITICAL ANIMALS 

    Friends, if you think that a dog was elected U.S. President in the last election, you should live in Rabbit Hash, KY, where, in January (the very month Trump was sworn in as Pres), a PIT BULL was ‘indawgurated’ as the town’s fourth canine mayor since 1998:

    The Rabbit Hash election may have been the pit’s, but there’s no denying the popularity of the dog mayor. As town historian Don Clare said last week, “People are tired of the political climate of lying. I think humans are finally coming to their senses after all we’ve been through in the last seven months. You just can look at a dog’s face and know that he is true blue and not trying to fake you.”

    Long-time followers of this blog may recall that I’ve hopped on down the bunny trail to the nearby town of Rabbit Hash and posted in the past about the former mayor (border collie Lucy Lou)….but now I come to find that Rabbit Hash isn’t alone in having animal mayors. At first, this may get your goat, butt hang in there; at second, it’s the cat’s meow:

    There have also been animals elected to political office in several small towns in Washington state, Minnesota and elsewhere, but alas, it seems that most voters aren’t as enlightened as their Rabbit Hash counterparts, and continue to elect less deserving humans (though it must be admitted that some have been jackasses). But then, as H.L. Mencken pointed out: Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise than religion has made them good.

    I will close with a few ass-inine quotes as examples of why humans leave a lot to be desired as political animals:
    Once you’ve seen one ghetto, you’ve seen them all. –Spiro Agnew, former Maryland Governor and U.S. Vice President
    [On my commission, I have] every kind of mix you can have. I have a black, I have a woman, two Jews and a cripple. –James Watt, former U.S. Interior Secretary
    The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep. –George Stephanopolous (when he was an aide to Bill Clinton)
    As for yours truly, I haven’t posted all of the quotes I intended to post, but as they say of Trump’s tweets, enough is enough.

     

     
    • Garfield Hug 8:22 am on July 27, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      Haha! I think my inanimate furball Garfield could also run for President😝😸🤔or I could borrow one of Samantha’s cats😉…perhaps they could do a little better? 😃😃

      Liked by 3 people

    • mistermuse 8:34 am on July 27, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      Fur be it from me to say Garfield wouldn’t make a better President than the Tweety bird now occupying the White House. Even if Garfield did nothing, it would be an improvement! 🙂

      Liked by 3 people

    • D. Wallace Peach 12:21 pm on July 27, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      I think a dog would make a much more humane president than the one we have now. Those quotes are amazing – I think my brain exploded. 😀

      Liked by 3 people

      • mistermuse 1:54 pm on July 27, 2017 Permalink | Reply

        What can I say? It might be entertaining watching Trump apologists take themselves seriously as they make excuses for him….if it weren’t so sad.

        Liked by 3 people

    • Ricardo 5:45 pm on July 27, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      It seems some of your readers are pining for an animal President. Bearing in mind that the President has to be at least 35 years old, dogs and cats are out–you’re talking a horse (who might easily die in office), one of the great apes, a whale or (a possibly politically dubious choice) an elephant. I think quahogs also live past 35, but I don’t see an American consenting to be ruled over by an oyster. Although it might be superior to what we have now.

      Liked by 4 people

      • mistermuse 9:07 pm on July 27, 2017 Permalink | Reply

        Ricardo, if I could choose an animal for President, it would be my boyhood favorite DONALD DUCK, who is two years older than I and thus qualified not only by age, but (compared to the human Donald) by temperament. Actually, the human Donald has been sounding like the duck Donald for some time now:

        Liked by 2 people

    • Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, MCC, SCAC 12:58 am on July 28, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      Loved the post – “liked” the comments – and I’m with all of you. ANYTHING would be better – even a pet rock. But the fuzzies are definitely cuter. Did they run as Independents?
      xx,
      mgh
      (Madelyn Griffith-Haynie – ADDandSoMuchMORE dot com)
      ADD/EFD Coach Training Field founder; ADD Coaching co-founder
      “It takes a village to transform a world!”

      Liked by 2 people

    • linnetmoss 6:39 am on July 28, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      I would like most of my state’s congressional delegation to be replaced by Dogs. They would be much more loving and caring, and far less selfish. Although we might end up with a health care bill of walkies, extra nap time, and guaranteed coverage for flea treatments.

      Liked by 3 people

    • mistermuse 8:42 am on July 28, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      It seems you don’t have to be a dog to take extra nap time — this list of famous nappers includes 3 Presidents:
      http://www.artofmanliness.com/2011/03/14/the-napping-habits-of-8-famous-men/

      Liked by 1 person

    • MC Clark 10:37 pm on July 28, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      All politicians suck, not just Trump. I, for one, vote we replace all of them with oysters, prove Ricardo above wrong. 😁

      Liked by 2 people

    • mistermuse 7:37 am on July 29, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      I think I would opt for wise old owls rather than oysters to replace politicians, but I agree that politics seems to bring out the worst in most of them (exhibit #1: Donald Trump).

      Liked by 1 person

    • literaryeyes 12:39 pm on July 31, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      All the promises he INTENDED to keep -vintage Bill Clinton-speak! Loved the quotes!

      Liked by 1 person

      • mistermuse 1:54 pm on July 31, 2017 Permalink | Reply

        My guess is that that quote didn’t quite come out the way Stephanopolous intended, but told it like it was without meaning to. But probably almost all politicians make promises they (should) know they won’t be able to keep, or make them because they know that’s what voters want to hear. Some just do it more shamelessly than others.

        Like

  • mistermuse 12:01 am on July 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , , , , , voting   

    DON’T LOSE YOUR HEAD 

    What would you do without your head? Well, you might become a candidate for President of the United Horsemen of Sleepy Hollow….or President of the United States of America. Just the thought of the latter naturally points to the strange case of one Donald Trump, a septuagenarian who appears to have a head — but every word emanating from said head makes it apparent that it isn’t a real head, but a cartoon head, with real drawing power.

    And here all the Time

    Now, it’s possible that Sir Donald, of House of Orange fame, was born with an ordinary human head (hard to picture, but possible). If so, it seems obvious that at some point he irretrievably lost it (perhaps in a naval exercise, or maybe it was told “You’re fired!” when he was an ANT (Apprentice Narcissistic Tycoon). Of course, it would never do for someone of his stature to appear headless (not great for the image), so no doubt he struck a great deal with a great cartoonist to draw a big replacement head on his shoulders that would not only be the envy of every bird seeking a nesting site, but would look great and inspire many tweets in the bargain.

    Needless to say, the cartoonist succeeded in creating an artistic wonder, notwithstanding the fact that every time the head said something, it made its bear-er look like an ass. Of course, that’s not the cartoonist’s fault, but Sir Donald blamed him anyway, because that’s what winners do to losers (of everything but heads). Naturally, Sir Donald’s followers drank it up, because everything he says goes down like Dr. Trump’s Original Snake Oil, ‘still-made’ right here in the good old U.S. of A. by Mexican aliens, and guaranteed great for the constitution, for soothing fear, and curing everything that aliens you.

    And so, my fellow Americans, the choice is queer (heterosexually speaking). The time is now. Or is it the choice is now and the times are queer? Anyway, if your mind (assuming you haven’t lost your head reading this post) was undecided as to who or whom to vote for at the start of this treatise, I trust that is no longer a problem.

    This has been a public service announcement brought to you as a public service. I thank you.

    P.S. Thanks also to Wayne Hogan for providing the cartoon which provided the idea for this post. If his name sounds vaguely familiar, another great Wayne’s world classic appears on the cover of my book SEX SCELLS, which I seem to recall a few of you buying under duress way back when (and of which I just happen to have some leftover copies, in case anyone’s interested).

     
    • arekhill1 2:25 pm on July 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      It’s too bad Trump already has a biographer that detests him, Sr. Muse, because it was a lucrative position you could have easily filled.

      Like

    • mistermuse 6:19 pm on July 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      I’d heard that The Donald has a biographer, but I wasn’t aware that the biographer detests him. I wouldn’t be surprised if his barber — er, hair stylist — detests him too, having to clean all the bird poop from The Donald’s scalp before starling — er, starting — on his hair.

      Like

    • inesephoto 7:51 am on July 31, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Whatever you get, guys, you will have to keep living. Politicians come and go, but you have only one life.

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 12:02 pm on July 31, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      True, but at my age, my one life is already approaching an American man’s average life span, and I’d like to live it out under a President who isn’t full of himself and who thinks of none other than himself . 😦

      Liked by 1 person

    • Don Frankel 2:17 pm on August 1, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      I think you’re being too kind to The Donald Himself. First he is not a Sir. You have to get knighted by the Queen to be a Sir anything. But we’ve tried to make the connection to Hitler once before and it seems the message did not get out. However tune in tomorrow where we try again.

      Like

    • mistermuse 5:49 pm on August 1, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      I will indeed tune in tomorrow, Don, and any reader here can do the same by going to the Blogroll near the bottom of the column to the right and clicking “Speak Without Interruption” to view your post on Aug. 2.

      Like

    • eths 6:20 pm on August 1, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Well, he is really outdoing himself this week with spewing even more hatred!

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 9:02 pm on August 1, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Nothing Trump says surprises me any more. Some might call him an ignoramus on steroids, but that would be an insult to typical ignoramuses.

      Like

    • Mél@nie 9:45 am on August 3, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      @”What would you do without your head?” – the Romanians use to reply: well, it would rain or snow in your throat… 🙂

      • * *

      just like you, nothing surprises us about the wigged ignorant racist “dude”… he used to be an entertainer, he’s turned into an embarrassing and shameless character for lots of Americans, both in the US and abroad… brrr!!!

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 2:57 pm on August 3, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      If I ever travel to Romania, I must remember to keep my head in bad weather! 🙂

      Words are completely inadequate to describe this travesty of a potential President named Donald Trump. We can only hope that our votes against him are adequate to defeat him

      Like

    • BroadBlogs 1:53 am on August 4, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      “the choice is queer (heterosexually speaking). The time is now. Or is it the choice is now and the times are queer?”

      Both, I’d say.

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 7:15 am on August 4, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      It’s clear you’re right.

      Like

  • mistermuse 12:02 am on October 10, 2015 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , grammar, , , literacy test, , , , , voting   

    GOP AIN’T GOT NO USE FOR PROPER GRAMMAR NOHOW 

    In a recent study by those grammar-checking nerds at http://www.grammarly.com/ (which is literally the literacy liturgist of all things literate and literary), it was found that supporters of current Republican candidates are more than twice as grammatically challenged as their Democratic counterparts.

    Yes, friends, that which I have long suspected….has now been proven true: many right-wing Republicans don’t know their asterisks from a hole in the ground. According to the study, ass-kissers of GOP candidates on Facebook made an average of 8.7 grammatical mistakes (misspellings, punctuation, etc.) per 100 words, compared to 4.2 mistakes for supporters of Dems. Furthermore, Dem ass-kissers demonstrated a larger vocabulary, using on average 300 unique words per 1,000 words, while Repubs used butt 245.

    But I’m almost at a loss for words at the news that the biggest loser was DONALD TRUMP, whose partisans made an average of 12.6 mistakes per 100 words. In fact, not a single GOP candidate’s backers scored better than the backers of any of the five Democratic candidates, whose scores ranged from 3.1 mistakes (Lincoln Chafee) to 3.7 (Bernie Sanders) to 6.3 (Hillary Clinton).

    I hate to say it, but let us face facts. As much as we may revel in the boastful bloviating of The Donald, not to mention Rick Sanitarium (11.5  supporter mistakes per 100) and the rest of the GOP Presidential-wannabes, their constituents are a bunch of semi-literate, half-witted cretins (not to put too fine a point on it). And, sad to say, because of their limited vocabulary, these language-challenged dunces often resort to mean-spirited name calling as their only means of expressing their idiotic opinions — something which this writer, of course, would never stoop to.

    This is indeed a sorry state of affairs. America can ill afford to have elections decided by those who don’t know the difference between a diphthong and a dipstick (not to mention elections decided by those whose opinions differ from mine). Perhaps it’s time to bring back the old voter literacy tests — but instead of tests meant to keep Southern State blacks from voting, we need tests designed to keep ignorant right-wing Republicans from voting.

    This need not be complicated. Disqualification could be as expedient as this:

    If you plan to vote for a candidate whose first name is Donald, Rick, TedBenBobby, Carly, or Mike, sign on this line with an “X” ______.  God bless you for exorcising your right to vote.

    P.S. As my faithful readers know, I posted my choice a month ago. I’m voting for Lucy Lou.

     

     

     
    • scifihammy 12:57 am on October 10, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      haha I really enjoyed this 🙂

      Liked by 3 people

    • mistermuse 6:25 am on October 10, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      ….but probably not half as much as I enjoyed writing it!!! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    • Rita 7:39 am on October 10, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Wow, I’m for Lucy as well. This is great.

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 10:03 am on October 10, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Thank you for joining the I LOVE LUCY crowd – I’m sure you will have a Ball. 🙂

      Like

    • arekhill1 1:28 pm on October 10, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Republicans have sought to corner the idiot vote for years. Who can argue with this? As a wise illiterate once said, it am what it be.

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 4:42 pm on October 10, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      “Against stupidity, the gods themselves contend in vain.” –Friedrich Schiller

      Liked by 1 person

    • charlypriest 6:27 am on October 11, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      So half of the country are gramatically challenged to say the least then……
      Anyways, what I found amusing here is that there are guys that will come up with this idea. Got to love the U.S of A. It certainly makes politics interesting

      Like

    • mistermuse 7:13 am on October 11, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Not just politics, but the whole of human nature. Now that I think about it, that must be why I titled this blog THE OBSERVATION POST.

      Liked by 1 person

    • TOKEN 8:09 pm on October 12, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Adoxography and witzelsucht!

      It is simply because the intelligent Republicans are at work and don’t have the time to respond to such sophistry, as opposed to many inaniloquent lefties who have nothing better to do with their time than attend to the concilliabule.

      Did they actually count how many nasty names were called along the way? I’ll bet the abderian Dems won that contest too.

      Just my observations if semi-literate, half-witted, mean-spirited, hate-mongering, racist cretins and vocabulary-challenged dunces are still permitted to comment…

      Bring on the exsibilation… Peace 😉

      Like

    • mistermuse 10:55 pm on October 12, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Just a thought, but if you have time, you may want to consider the possibility that if the “intelligent Republicans don’t have time to respond to such sophistry,” it’s because they’re too busy engaging in their own sophistry.

      And, as you can tell by my approving your comment, “semi-literate, half-witted, mean-spirited, hate-mongering [your addition to the list], racist cretins and vocabulary-challenged dunces” are indeed permitted to comment.

      Peace is good. Seriously. Peace.

      Like

    • TOKEN 11:22 pm on October 12, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      I expect that is probably true. That is what is wrong with it all, isn’t it?

      LOL And as you can tell, I wouldn’t waste time and do so enjoy the abuse, therefore I expected nothing less from you in the first place!

      However, judging from the candidates we have on all sides, I’m seriously considering a vote for the Resident of Rabbit Hash or a Californian of some description…

      Like

    • mistermuse 11:45 pm on October 12, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      I was just about to add to my previous reply that it should be seen in the same spirit as this post, which was categorized and tagged as “humor and “satire,” but your second comment beat me to the punch. In any case, I repeat “Peace is good,” and I’m glad I lived up to your expectations. 🙂

      Like

      • mistermuse 4:11 am on October 13, 2015 Permalink | Reply

        It dawned on me this morning, what with my first name being Ken, that if “TOKEN” is taken as a contraction of “TO KEN,” the instigator of last night’s back-and-forth may be someone who knows me from palmier days at SWI. If so, the tenor of TOKEN’s comments leads me to suspect that his first name is Michael, and perhaps I should revisit his (what first struck me as) something approaching affectation….as, rather, something approaching affection?

        If I’ve left my imagination run away with me, I trust TOKEN will pardon my jumping to conclusions. Otherwise, it’s always good to hear from you, Michael, though you might have waited until Halloween to come disguised as a TOKEN of yourself. Clever masquerade, though. 🙂

        Like

    • To Ken 6:14 am on October 13, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Alas you crafty devil; you have figured out my chicanery! I did enjoy getting away with it, even for just a short time. Just a token of my affection… Have a great day 🙂

      Like

    • mistermuse 7:40 am on October 13, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      From now on, when I hear the old saying, “Don’t take any wooden nickels,” it will inevitably translate in my mind to DON’T TAKE ANY WOODEN TOKENS. At any rate, I miss our old “meeting (of the minds) place” – that is, your reflections on nature – and hope you enjoyed my Sept. 25 post THE NATURAL LIST.

      Like

    • BroadBlogs 12:22 pm on October 13, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Their thoughts are so jumbled, how could their words not be?

      Like

    • mistermuse 3:58 pm on October 13, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Perhaps that’s why the elephant is the symbol of the GOP – you know, Jumble the elephant…..oh, wait, I confused Jumble with Jumbo. I’d better get my act together before people start to think I’m a Republican. Or even a jackass, but I’m not a Democrat either.

      Like

    • Don Frankel 6:47 pm on October 13, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Lucy Lou’s supporters make no mistakes.

      Like

    • mistermuse 9:00 pm on October 13, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      To the best of my knowledge, Lucy Lou has never denied being a dog (which is more than you can say for most politicians), so how can we make a mistake supporting such an honest candidate?

      Like

    • Mél@nie 1:32 am on October 19, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      your witty, common sense and realistic article has reminded me that we lived in Houston, TX(NASA area) for 5 years, but we did visit other states…. as a language teacher, I was beyond surprised to come across English native speakers who used to ask me spelling, grammar, or syntax questions… btw, English is my 3rd language, so long story, short: you’re sooo right, Sir! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 7:18 am on October 19, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Because English is your 3rd language, I can’t help but admire (even though you’re a language teacher) your ability to “get” my frequent use of wordplay, much of which I suspect is more than many Americans get. So, when you were in Texas and other states, I’m not all that surprised that you were asked such questions. In my opinion, Americans (in general) are very good at technology, but sadly lacking in sophistication language arts-wise.

      Like

  • mistermuse 2:16 am on September 10, 2015 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: campaign song, , , I Love Lucy, , political party names, , , , third party candidates, voting   

    TODAY, MAYOR OF RABBIT HASH; TOMORROW, LEADER OF THE FLEA WORLD 

    Five days ago, this blog broke the news of a fetching, but pugnacious, new Presidential candidate: Lucy Lou, border collie Mayor of Rabbit Hash, KY.

    Three years ago, in a post for another blog, I urged the need for a viable third party in America to break the stranglehold of the two entrenched parties on the electoral process.

    Today, we bring it all together by proposing that Lucy Lou head up such a third party in order to enhance her chances of winning the election. But let us not put the cart before the tail — the first thing a third party needs is a catchy name to get the ball cart rolling. Three years ago, I proposed such potential attention-grabbers as The Holier-Than-Thou Party, The Head-Them-Off-At-The-Impasse Party, and The Free Beer Party, but not even the latter went down well with more than a handful of readers — possibly because I didn’t have more than a handful of readers at the time.

    In any case, as I reported then, my one or two minutes of exhaustive research found that when a 3rd or 4th party tried to jump start their bid for popular support, most barely got off the ground, even in other countries — despite choosing such serious sobriquets as the following:

    THE DEADLY SERIOUS PARTY (Australia)
    THE PARTY! PARTY! PARTY! PARTY (Australia)
    THE ABSOLUTELY ABSURD PARTY (Canada)
    THE FED-UP PARTY (aka THE F U PARTY) (Canada)
    PARTITO DELL’AMORE (THE LOVE PARTY) (Italy)

    But I am not deterred, because this time we will have man’s best friend as our standard bearer, and I believe that any appellation which reminds the electorate of that fact will serve the purpose. Thus, I propose the following names for consideration, and I invite my by-now-vast legions of readers to vote for their favorite, or even come up with a write-in candidate if none of these suit your fancy:

    THE I LOVE LUCY LOU PARTY
    THE OPEN BORDER-COLLIE PARTY
    THE CANINE REFORM ALLIANCE PARTY (CRAP)
    THE RAISE THE MINIMUM WAGS PARTY
    THE PARTY POOPER PARTY
    THE WHAT GOOD ARE CATS PARTY
    THE LET THEM EAT KIBBLES ‘N BITS PARTY
    THE HOWLING HAIRY HUSH PUPPIES PARTY
    THE TOP DOG PARTY

    Finally, getting the campaign off on the right paw requires a campaign song, and it’s hard to imagine a more fitting campaign song for a good ol’ country dog from Kentucky than this:

     
    • Don Frankel 9:13 am on September 10, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      I’m going with The Top Dog Party because it’s what all parties aspire too and we would just be honest about it. And, yes I’m joining too.

      Like

    • arekhill1 9:37 am on September 10, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      How about the Heaven on Earth Party because, according to some sources, all dogs go there?

      Like

    • mistermuse 12:28 pm on September 10, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Don, your 9th-and-last-name-on-the-list choice reminds me that it should have been a Top TEN List (who ever heard of a Top Nine List?). This gives me an excellent excuse – I mean reason – to add Ricardo’s “Heaven on Earth Party” to the roster (not that it doesn’t warrant inclusion on its own merits).

      Like

    • arekhill1 12:41 pm on September 10, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Or take the opposite tack and call it The Underdog Party, which it surely is, and hope to capture the votes of the Sweet Polly Purebred demographic.

      Like

    • mistermuse 1:49 pm on September 10, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Good point, which calls for an additional appropriate campaign song:

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wQEm6HZuTl8

      Like

    • Don Frankel 4:42 am on September 11, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Actually Muse the Major League Baseball channel has a top 9, as in the top 9 hitters or pitchers of all time. As they say there are 9 innings and 9 positions on the field. So we can have 9 top Dogs here and I’m honored to one of them.

      Like

    • mistermuse 6:16 am on September 11, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      I withstand corrected, Don. Frankly, I think some teams (like my Cin. Reds this season) are so miserable that they should be allowed 10 positions on the field. They still probably wouldn’t be contenders, but at least it might make the game more interesting.

      Like

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