Tagged: Father’s Day Toggle Comment Threads | Keyboard Shortcuts

  • mistermuse 9:39 am on June 17, 2018 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , cursive writing, Egyptians, Father's Day, hieroglyphics, , physicians, , Sumerians   

    THE WRITE BROTHERS 

    Ancient Sumerians wrote in cuneiform;
    Ancient Egyptians wrote in hieroglyphics.
    Ancient Americans write in cursive form;
    Impatient physicians write in hieroglyphics.

    As an ancient American who still writes poems in cursive form, I wish my fellow fathers everywhere a Happy Father’s Day.Ā 

     
  • mistermuse 12:24 am on July 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: dieting, dough, , , Father's Day, , Mother's Day, overweight, pants, , ,   

    DO YOU HAVE PANTY/WAIST PROBLEMS? 

    As you know, July 27 is one of theĀ biggest holidays of the year: it’sĀ TAKE YOUR PANTS FOR A WALK DAY. Now, those of us who take our pants (or panties)Ā for a walk every day may wonder why there’sĀ one special day set aside to celebrate such a normal, mundane activity. The answer,Ā by way ofĀ analogy, isĀ that most of us are mothers or fathersĀ every day, but we stillĀ haveĀ singleĀ Mother’s andĀ Father’s Days to honor what weĀ do everyĀ day….unless, of course, we can afford to delegate theĀ care of ourĀ offspring to aĀ ritzyĀ boarding school in France, orĀ however parents who are wealthyĀ get their darlingĀ little monster(s)Ā out of theirĀ better-things-to-do livesĀ for extended periods.

    Anyway,Ā far be it from me not to take this walkĀ day — and its health benefits —Ā seriously. And yet, it seems to me that the idea of exercising your pants/panties is a red herringbone. Sure, your pants may be getting a tad tight around the middle, but is that your pants’ fault? Let’s face it — if your pants no longer fit, you’re getting fat, and a walk around the block isn’t going to do much for either you or your pants.Ā You need to address theĀ real problem — and luckily for you, I have the solution:

    THE WAGES OF THIN

    Overweight? Not to worry —
    You can lose it in a hurry!
    Here is all you knead to know:
    Inhibit your intake of dough.

    When, of dough, you indulges —
    Like your wallet, you get bulges.
    Don’t be all that you can be —
    Send half of all you make to me!

     
    • Michaeline Montezinos 12:26 am on July 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      very savvy mistermuse

      Like

    • mistermuse 5:18 am on July 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Such are the wages of sin that we deny the errors of our ways. Of course, I’m so svelte that I don’t have to worry about such things.

      Like

    • scifihammy 5:57 am on July 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      hahaha If it was that easy to lose weight, we’d all be super thin, and you’d be a billionaire! šŸ™‚

      Like

    • mistermuse 6:15 am on July 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      I’ll settle for millionaire. šŸ™‚

      Like

    • Don Frankel 7:06 am on July 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Don’t laugh guys. No wait laugh. It’s a funny poem but if you’re up late at night or early in the morning there are a plethora of people out there telling you just that. You can lose weight without dieting or exercising. Just buy the pills or the powder that you sprinkle on your food. It’s all for 29.99. Or you if you want to look like some Olympic styled athlete, buy the DVDs for… you guessed it fans $29.99. I’d rather read Muse.

      No wait! That’s an idea read funny poems, read satirical articles by Don and Richard and laugh. Laugh so much you forget to eat and then of course, lose weight! And, all of this for just…. $29.99. Seems to be the magic number.

      Like

    • mistermuse 9:47 am on July 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Readers can send my $29.99 directly to Richard as a tax-deductible contribution to his Presidential election campaign….at least, I think it’s tax deductible. On second thought, better send it to me so I can check it out. Better yet, send cash and I won’t have to check it out. What Richard doesn’t know can’t hurt him.

      Like

    • arekhill1 10:33 am on July 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      And there’s much I don’t know, hence much that doesn’t hurt me. In the words of the song, what a wonderful world.

      Liked by 1 person

    • Osyth 12:14 pm on July 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Love that … don’t blame the pants (which being English are Panties the Pant being known as a trouser) šŸ˜€

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 3:53 pm on July 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Many thanks for the info. This is entirely within my mission of having a blog to go to for the real poop, if you’ll pardon my English. And the best part is that with contributions from knowledgeable sources like you, I come out smelling like a rose for attracting the best comments anywhere. šŸ™‚

      Like

    • BroadBlogs 2:14 pm on July 28, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Who knew? Thanks for educating us. Nothing I love more than a good walkā€“ Not many things, anyway. Unfortunately, I don’t think I will get a walk today. (Tear drop)

      Liked by 1 person

    • BroadBlogs 2:14 pm on July 28, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Oh, I just saw that this was posted yesterday. I did take a walk yesterday!

      Like

    • mistermuse 3:31 pm on July 28, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      I forgive you, because I’m sure that’s the first mistake you’ve ever made. šŸ™‚
      I, on the other hand, have never made any (since the last one). šŸ˜¦

      Like

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