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  • mistermuse 8:08 am on July 27, 2017 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , elections, , , , ,   

    POLITICAL ANIMALS 

    Friends, if you think that a dog was elected U.S. President in the last election, you should live in Rabbit Hash, KY, where, in January (the very month Trump was sworn in as Pres), a PIT BULL was ‘indawgurated’ as the town’s fourth canine mayor since 1998:

    The Rabbit Hash election may have been the pit’s, but there’s no denying the popularity of the dog mayor. As town historian Don Clare said last week, “People are tired of the political climate of lying. I think humans are finally coming to their senses after all we’ve been through in the last seven months. You just can look at a dog’s face and know that he is true blue and not trying to fake you.”

    Long-time followers of this blog may recall that I’ve hopped on down the bunny trail to the nearby town of Rabbit Hash and posted in the past about the former mayor (border collie Lucy Lou)….but now I come to find that Rabbit Hash isn’t alone in having animal mayors. At first, this may get your goat, butt hang in there; at second, it’s the cat’s meow:

    There have also been animals elected to political office in several small towns in Washington state, Minnesota and elsewhere, but alas, it seems that most voters aren’t as enlightened as their Rabbit Hash counterparts, and continue to elect less deserving humans (though it must be admitted that some have been jackasses). But then, as H.L. Mencken pointed out: Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise than religion has made them good.

    I will close with a few ass-inine quotes as examples of why humans leave a lot to be desired as political animals:
    Once you’ve seen one ghetto, you’ve seen them all. –Spiro Agnew, former Maryland Governor and U.S. Vice President
    [On my commission, I have] every kind of mix you can have. I have a black, I have a woman, two Jews and a cripple. –James Watt, former U.S. Interior Secretary
    The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep. –George Stephanopolous (when he was an aide to Bill Clinton)
    As for yours truly, I haven’t posted all of the quotes I intended to post, but as they say of Trump’s tweets, enough is enough.

     

     
    • Garfield Hug 8:22 am on July 27, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      Haha! I think my inanimate furball Garfield could also run for President😝😸🤔or I could borrow one of Samantha’s cats😉…perhaps they could do a little better? 😃😃

      Liked by 3 people

    • mistermuse 8:34 am on July 27, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      Fur be it from me to say Garfield wouldn’t make a better President than the Tweety bird now occupying the White House. Even if Garfield did nothing, it would be an improvement! 🙂

      Liked by 3 people

    • D. Wallace Peach 12:21 pm on July 27, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      I think a dog would make a much more humane president than the one we have now. Those quotes are amazing – I think my brain exploded. 😀

      Liked by 3 people

      • mistermuse 1:54 pm on July 27, 2017 Permalink | Reply

        What can I say? It might be entertaining watching Trump apologists take themselves seriously as they make excuses for him….if it weren’t so sad.

        Liked by 3 people

    • Ricardo 5:45 pm on July 27, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      It seems some of your readers are pining for an animal President. Bearing in mind that the President has to be at least 35 years old, dogs and cats are out–you’re talking a horse (who might easily die in office), one of the great apes, a whale or (a possibly politically dubious choice) an elephant. I think quahogs also live past 35, but I don’t see an American consenting to be ruled over by an oyster. Although it might be superior to what we have now.

      Liked by 4 people

      • mistermuse 9:07 pm on July 27, 2017 Permalink | Reply

        Ricardo, if I could choose an animal for President, it would be my boyhood favorite DONALD DUCK, who is two years older than I and thus qualified not only by age, but (compared to the human Donald) by temperament. Actually, the human Donald has been sounding like the duck Donald for some time now:

        Liked by 2 people

    • Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, MCC, SCAC 12:58 am on July 28, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      Loved the post – “liked” the comments – and I’m with all of you. ANYTHING would be better – even a pet rock. But the fuzzies are definitely cuter. Did they run as Independents?
      xx,
      mgh
      (Madelyn Griffith-Haynie – ADDandSoMuchMORE dot com)
      ADD/EFD Coach Training Field founder; ADD Coaching co-founder
      “It takes a village to transform a world!”

      Liked by 2 people

    • linnetmoss 6:39 am on July 28, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      I would like most of my state’s congressional delegation to be replaced by Dogs. They would be much more loving and caring, and far less selfish. Although we might end up with a health care bill of walkies, extra nap time, and guaranteed coverage for flea treatments.

      Liked by 3 people

    • mistermuse 8:42 am on July 28, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      It seems you don’t have to be a dog to take extra nap time — this list of famous nappers includes 3 Presidents:
      http://www.artofmanliness.com/2011/03/14/the-napping-habits-of-8-famous-men/

      Liked by 1 person

    • MC Clark 10:37 pm on July 28, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      All politicians suck, not just Trump. I, for one, vote we replace all of them with oysters, prove Ricardo above wrong. 😁

      Liked by 2 people

    • mistermuse 7:37 am on July 29, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      I think I would opt for wise old owls rather than oysters to replace politicians, but I agree that politics seems to bring out the worst in most of them (exhibit #1: Donald Trump).

      Liked by 1 person

    • literaryeyes 12:39 pm on July 31, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      All the promises he INTENDED to keep -vintage Bill Clinton-speak! Loved the quotes!

      Liked by 1 person

      • mistermuse 1:54 pm on July 31, 2017 Permalink | Reply

        My guess is that that quote didn’t quite come out the way Stephanopolous intended, but told it like it was without meaning to. But probably almost all politicians make promises they (should) know they won’t be able to keep, or make them because they know that’s what voters want to hear. Some just do it more shamelessly than others.

        Like

  • mistermuse 12:00 am on March 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , elections, , Glenn Beck, , , , Pat Robertson, political dysfunction, , , ,   

    YOU ARE WHO YOU ELECT 

    You are what you eat. –Dr. Victor Lindlahr, nutritionist (1897-1969)

    Pun aside, a lot of whater has passed under the bridge since Dr. Lindlahr coined the above phrase 75+ years ago, and the older I get, the more I’ve taken his caution to heart….with resulting good health to show for it (if I should drop dead tomorrow, I shall reluctantly admit I came to that conclusion a bit prematurely).

    But I have also come to see a parallel to this axiom in the public sector: it’s no accident that we have political dysfunction. We are who we elect. Our elected (and wanna-be elected) officials aren’t anomalies who have somehow passed under voters’ attention spans, leaving us to wonder how such coarse incivility found its way into the political mainstream. Well, wonder no more:

    http://www.gocomics.com/wumo/2016/03/28

    Obviously, then, eatin’ and politickin’ have a lot in common. As with our intellectual standards, if our table manners go down the drain, we regress into uncivilized louts. To combat this uncouth scourge, we must remember our etiquette. Politicians need to model their behavior after the culinary refinement of the epicure:

    Therefore, let us get back to the good old days when politicians may have been idiots, but at least they weren’t tasteless idiots with little sense of propriety. Take these examples:

    It’s time to put our blood or our urine where our mouth is. — Rep. Pat Murphy (D-IA) on drug testing, Feb. 1997

    We have brave men and women who are willing to step forward because they know what’s at stake. They’re willing to sacrifice their lives for this great country. What I’m asking all of you tonight is not to put on a uniform. Put on a [Rick Santorum] bumper sticker. Is it that much to ask? Is it that much to ask to step up and serve your country? –Senator Rick Santorum (R-PA), Jan. 2006

    My problem was, I was too honest with you the first time. –Rep. Tillie Fowler (R-FL), explaining to her constituents why she changed positions.

    The feminist agenda is not about equal rights for women. It is about a socialist, antifamily political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, , kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism, and become lesbians. –Pat Robertson, 1992 fund raising letter

    They intend to vote on the Sabbath, during Lent, to take away the liberty that we have right from God. This is an affront to God. –Rep. Steve King (R-IA)

    Please burn before reading. –1972 Nixon White House illegal campaign tactics memo

    My friends, no matter how rough the road may be, we can and we will never, never surrender to what is right. –Dan Quayle, Vice President under George H.W. Bush

    I don’t think we came from monkeys. I think that’s ridiculous. I haven’t seen a half-monkey, half-person yet. –Glenn Beck (who apparently hadn’t looked in the mirror lately)

    OK, Pat Robertson and Glenn Beck aren’t politicians. Hey, nobody’s perfect. Well, maybe Sarah Palin is, but we don’t have time to do her justice, so I’ll close with this reminder:

     

     

     

     

     
    • Midwestern Plant Girl 5:24 am on March 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      I love this quote by Alexander Tyler (or whomever, as I’ve seen speculation he said it. However, it is an awesome quote! )
      The average age of the world’s greatest civilizations from the beginning of history, has been about 200 years. During those 200 years, these nations always progressed through the following sequence:

      From bondage to spiritual faith;
      From spiritual faith to great courage;
      From courage to liberty;
      From liberty to abundance;
      From abundance to complacency;
      From complacency to apathy;
      From apathy to dependence;
      From dependence back into bondage

      Liked by 3 people

      • mistermuse 7:41 am on March 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        The patriotic concept of “American Exceptionalism” may have its appeal, but when it’s an OVER-patriotic concept, I fear it’s leading America down the path of the sequence you outline.

        P.S. To those who read this post prior to a half hour ago, I apologize for the confusing link which followed the first two paragraphs (due to my technological incompetence). The wumo cartoon which appears there now is the correct link.

        Liked by 2 people

    • ladysighs 6:01 am on March 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      My only thought is “This too shall pass.”

      Liked by 2 people

    • mistermuse 7:54 am on March 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Let us hope it passes before blindness makes America unable to see what we’re eating, election-wise!

      Liked by 1 person

    • Cynthia Jobin 8:32 am on March 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      I got very side-tracked here—enjoyably so—with more videos of the Hoosier Hot Shots….”From the Indies to the Andes in His Undies,”…etc. Thanks for the introduction!

      Liked by 2 people

    • arekhill1 9:45 am on March 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Leave it to Pat Robertson to hit the nail right on the head–it’s the girls that are going to do all the heavy lifting, as usual.

      Like

    • mistermuse 9:46 am on March 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Cynthia, I must confess a weakness for the Hoosier Hot Shots (I own dozens of their old 78s), which I guess proves that appreciation of wit and “cornball humor” can co-exist in one package. Now if only conservatives and progressives could learn to co-exist cooperatively in one country! 😦

      Liked by 2 people

    • mistermuse 9:58 am on March 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Ricardo, it’s not too late to send Pat Robertson (born March 22, 1930) a belated Happy Birthday card to show your appreciation for all he’s done to keep this country from going to the dogs (so it can go to the troglodytes instead).

      Liked by 1 person

    • Mél@nie 2:49 pm on March 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      I do hope the blond wigged ignorant, racist, barking character will lose…

      • * *

      @”Pat Robertson and Glenn Beck aren’t politicians.” – yeah, I do recall those “bright minds” who have invented hot water(LOL!), and another one “flush limbo”(Rush Limbaugh!)… brrr!!!

      Liked by 1 person

      • mistermuse 3:29 pm on March 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        Some say that’s Trump’s real hair, but in any case, I’m far more concerned about what’s in his head, not on top of it. Speaking of questioning what’s real, Robertson, Beck and Limbaugh (not to mention Sarah Palin) must be cartoon characters — it’s hard to believe real people could be such buffoons (on second thought, maybe not so hard to believe).

        Liked by 1 person

    • tomorrowdefinitely 2:55 pm on March 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Great quotes, my favourite is of course Pat Robertson’s prognosis of what feminism entails, he he he!

      Liked by 2 people

    • mistermuse 3:48 pm on March 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Note that Robertson’s “prognosis” was stated in a fund raising letter. As a man of God, he not only knows and proclaims God’s will, but knows how to reach into his followers’ pockets while doing it.

      Liked by 1 person

    • Don Frankel 4:14 pm on March 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      There is one candidate and only one candidate who can explain to America that it is rough. And, if they don’t get it, she can explain that it is ruff, ruff. And, if they don’t get it, or don’t like it or her, she can always pee on their leg.

      http://www.rabbithashhistsoc.org/the-mayor/current-mayor-lucy-lou/

      Like

    • mistermuse 10:59 pm on March 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Unfortunately, I haven’t heard a peep – or should I say, a ruff – out of Lucy Lou lately, Don (ever since fire destroyed the Rabbit Hash General Store). Apparently fearing a vast right paw conspiracy, the Secret Service is still insisting that she live indognito. I hear The Donald was asked to have “his people” look into it, but The Donald wasn’t biting, as he’d rather face Hillary in the election because he doesn’t think she would pee on his leg….plus, she’s very vulnerable as long as her pee-mails remain under investigation.

      Like

    • Don Frankel 6:57 pm on March 31, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Pee-mails? I love it. I might steal it.

      Like

    • mistermuse 7:26 pm on March 31, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Hillary probably loves it too. If she can keep her pee-mails in the mainstream, investigators will find it hard to build a cut-and-dry case against her.

      Liked by 1 person

    • barkinginthedark 12:30 pm on July 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      of course agree that morons abound in GOP…and, interesting to me u show “Etiquette Blues” – on one of my CD’s “Who Could Imagine” is my anti GOP song “Etiquette.” nice. continue…

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 1:15 pm on July 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      I see that Trump just bounced ahead of Hillary in the post-GOP convention poll, which suggests to me that moron-ism is spreading outside of GOP circles. If Hillary doesn’t get a similar bounce after the Dem convention, she (and the country) could be in big trouble.

      Liked by 1 person

  • mistermuse 11:42 am on September 5, 2015 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: candidates, , elections, general stores, , , , , jackass, , , ,   

    AT LAST, A CANDIDATE WHO GIVES US PAWS 

    Over the river and through the woods, not far downstream from where I live, to the Ohio River metropolis of Rabbit Hash, Kentucky, we go. As its 315 hutch dwellers know, Rabbit Hash’s administration has been going to the dogs since 1998, when a mutt named Goofy Bourneman was elected mayor. Sadly, His Honor the mayor was euthanized in 2004, which for some reason failed to start a national trend in political justice. Goofy was  succeeded by another dog,  Junior, who died in 2008, following which the current mayor, a border collie named Lucy Lou, was elected. For you skeptics out there, or those who have been asleep for the past 17 years, these events have been well documented:

    All of which brings us, litter-ly, to September 5, 2015, because on this day, the Mayor of Rabbit Hash, KY, Lucy Lou, announced that SHE IS RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT of these United States(?) of America. What with the faltering campaign of Hillary Clinton threatening to neuter her chances of becoming the first female President, the candidacy of Lucy Lou should be welcome news to all who feel it’s time to elect a real bitch (as opposed to the sons o’ bitches running for the GOP). After all, Lucy Lou ran circles around her 2008 mayoral competitors: nine other dogs, a cat, an opossum, a jackass and a human (presumably the latter two weren’t one and the same), so she’s a proven winner.

    Meanwhile, for those whose interests run more along less political lines, I close with this:

     
    • arekhill1 12:41 pm on September 5, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      “which for some reason failed to start a national trend in political justice.” Nice line.

      Like

    • mistermuse 4:20 pm on September 5, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Thanks — I couldn’t have said it better myself. Oh, wait — I did say it myself. Oh, well, accidents do happen.

      Like

    • BroadBlogs 12:43 am on September 7, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Go Lucy Lou!

      Liked by 1 person

      • mistermuse 7:05 am on September 7, 2015 Permalink | Reply

        ….or, to put it in the vernacular, “You go girl.”
        LUCY LOU FOR PRESIDENT!

        Like

    • Don Frankel 6:14 am on September 7, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      This is a town I think I could move to. I wouldn’t have to worry if the place was going to the Dogs.

      I would have voted for Lucy Lou too.

      Like

      • mistermuse 7:13 am on September 7, 2015 Permalink | Reply

        The country could do a lot worse than the way Rabbit Hash holds its elections. The only slight adjustment I’d make for the presidential election would be to disqualify all votes that aren’t for Lucy Lou.

        Like

    • Sharron 2:39 pm on October 9, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      I’d say Lucy Lou is a better candidate than most. Funny lines! Thanks for visiting my blog. I love company.

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 5:01 pm on October 9, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      In this case, Lucy Lou’s company, but three’s not a crowd….so Lucy Lou and I thank you.

      Like

  • mistermuse 8:42 pm on August 2, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: Brazil, , Ecuador, election campaigns, elections, , , , ,   

    CONTORTIONISTS AND DUMMIES 

    Every nation gets the government it deserves.  –Joseph de Maistre, 1811

    • * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

    Every once in a while — like every day — you see on TV/the Internet, or read in the newspaper, that politicians have done or said things that are so over-the-top, you can’t believe they emanated from a sensible, reasonable human being. And, of course, you are correct — they were actually begot by a verbal contortionist or a ventriloquist’s dummy. Who else could engage in such twisted logic or move their lips to the voice of ideological rote?

    Case in point: on Wednesday last, House Republicans sued the President for overreaching without congressional authority; on Thursday, they issued a statement putting the onus on the President to act on his own “without the need for congressional action, to secure our borders” — a contradiction that even several Republicans admitted made little sense.

    So what else is new(s)? Who elects such hypocrit-ters? Well, after exhaustive research, extensive investigation and having previously made up my mind, I have come to the conclusion that….WE do. Yes, it’s true. We voters are such dumb asses that we have been known to elect a real ass to office if he belongs to our political persuasion.

    Take the case of the good citizens of Milton, Washington, who in 1938 elected Boston Curtis to be Republican precinct committeeman. The Democratic mayor, to prove the point that many voters have no clue who they’re voting for, had managed to get Boston Curtis on the ballot by signing the filing documents as legal witness. Boston Curtis was a brown mule. I suspect that, like most mule-headed politicians, animal instinct took over and Boston Curtis refused to resign even after the truth came out when he brayed his victory speech.

    At least, Boston Curtis was among the living. Dead people have been known to win elections as well. In 2009, a 77 year old Alabama Republican ran for Bibb County Commissioner and won on the strength of straight party line voting, despite departing this vale of tears prior to the election. Likewise, a 96 year old Florida man won 56% of the vote for Orange County Tax Collector, notwithstanding dying before being elected. Apparently, tax-resenting voters figured a 96 year old tax collector wasn’t going to be too swift on the job, dead or alive.

    Of course, America doesn’t have a monopoly on clueless voters. In 1967, during an election campaign in Picoaza, Ecuador, the makers of Pulvapies (foot powder) aired an ad proclaiming, “Vote for any candidate, but if you want well-being and hygiene, vote for Pulvapies.” You guessed it — voters elected Pulvapies their new mayor (who knows — compared to the other candidates, Pulvapies may have been the best choice, hands down).

    On the other hand, the people of Sao Paulo, Brazil, knew very well who and what they were voting for when they elected a clown to their congress in 2010….an actual, illiterate clown, no less. Francisco Everardo Oliveira Silva (professional name Grumpy the Clown”), who ran using the campaign slogan, “It can’t get any worse,” got over 1.3 million votes (more than double the number of votes for his nearest challenger) by promising to do absolutely nothing if elected, other than finding out what they do with their time in Congress and telling the voters. Now that’s what I call a candid-ate.

    GRUMPY THE CLOWN! GRUMPY THE CLOWN! GRUMPY THE CLOWN! He da mano*!

    *Mano is slang for “man” in Portuguese (the language of Brazil).

     

     
    • Don Frankel 6:10 am on August 4, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      If the dead can vote then by God I say they can also serve!

      Like

    • mistermuse 8:12 am on August 4, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      I would vote for a dead tax collector every time.

      Like

    • arekhill1 9:59 am on August 4, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      I salute the Brazilian clown, and if I had the time, energy and moral character suited for any kind of office, would happily run on a program of doing absolutely nothing except cash my paycheck.

      Like

    • mistermuse 10:48 am on August 4, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      Despite the fact that we already have enough clowns in Congress unsuited for office and accomplishing nothing, I would vote for you, Ricardo, because as Grumpy said, “It can’t get any worse.” Just kidding – I don’t know how, but it probably could get worse. 🙂

      Like

    • Michaeline Montezinos 9:04 pm on August 4, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      I would vote for both of you, mistermuse and Richard on the very fact you are both so knowledgeable about politics that in doing nothing you both may stem the dam of repitive gerymandering and hypocritical assumptions. 😉

      Like

    • mistermuse 7:06 am on August 5, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      Don’t forget Don Frankel – since his hip operation, I’m sure he’s very knowedgeable too.
      I would also vote for you, Michaeline, just on general principles – such as the idea that you would vote for me.

      Like

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