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  • mistermuse 6:28 pm on August 20, 2018 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: cats, , , kitten, , lyin' king, , , POLITICAL ANIMALS, ,   

    IT’S REIGNING CATS AND DOGS 

    This morning’s newspaper brings news of “another copycat slinking in on Rabbit Hash’s paw-litical scene.” As long-time readers may recall from my posts of 7/27/17 and earlier, Rabbit Hash is a small canine-run KY town on the banks of the Ohio River, not far from…

    Now It seems that the small village of Omena, Michigan, has elected as mayor a feline named Sweet Tart (not to mention two dogs and a goat elected to lesser offices), and has received no small amount of pub in the bargain:

    Friends, I’m not saying that the Kentucky town is trying to hog all the attention for having an animal mayor, but one gets the impression that Rabbit Hash feels Omena is horning in on their territory. Bobbi Kayser, ex-exec secretary and campaign manager to the former mayor, border collie Lucy Lou (who ran on the slogan “The Bitch You Can Count On”), admitted as much in the news article. “It all started here in Rabbit Hash–a tradition that Rabbit Hash could claim as its own. Now, we can’t. I’m a bit resentful. I’ve heard that in addition to the cat in Michigan, down south there is a donkey serving as mayor.”

    Personally, I have a bigger problem with the jackass serving in the oval office, who yesterday referred to former White House counsel John Dean as a “rat” for his part in exposing Watergate. Unlike the Lyin’ King, Sweet Tart wasn’t born on Easy Street — as a kitten, she was found abandoned and half-starved alongside a trail near Omena in 2009. So I say “Lighten Up, Rabbit Hash” and “Good for Sweet Tart!” Just because people get jealous and fight like cats and dogs, doesn’t mean animals should lower themselves to human standards.

     

     
    • Paul Sunstone 9:12 pm on August 20, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      These days, a lot of Colorado’s mountain towns rely on tourism now that most of the mineral deposits they were founded to exploit have played out and the mines have closed. Years ago, one tiny unincorporated village in South Park (the South Park of cartoon fame) elected an orange cat mayor in order to justify tourist dollars flowing into the community.

      Beyond that, Diarrhea to Trump! Lord knows, he’s already got diarrhea of the Twitter account.

      Liked by 2 people

      • mistermuse 11:05 pm on August 20, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        ….not to mention most Republicans in Congress, who have jaundice of the backbone for failing to call out Trump’s most egregious slanders and lies.

        Liked by 2 people

    • masercot 6:33 am on August 21, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      A snake was elected as county treasurer in Hale County, PA. He was elected by a majority of voters after it came out that he was an adder.

      Liked by 2 people

      • mistermuse 9:35 am on August 21, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        Very interesting. I heard that a Lesser Anteater was voted out as ant catcher in Termite, Texas, for obvious reasons. Unfortunately, the sloth who was voted in is even less up to the job.

        Liked by 1 person

    • calmkate 6:52 am on August 26, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      OUCH, I hear you … heard about the 5yo carry on our mob have displayed … and we pay them for it??!?

      Liked by 1 person

    • America On Coffee 3:39 pm on October 30, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Bad justice reigning over politics. Which is cat and which is dog maybe we will soon find out. But, in order to have a government with better politicians, we have to clean up the supposed keepers and protectors of the constitution. The music is so surreal with the times.

      Liked by 1 person

  • mistermuse 12:00 am on July 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: cats, , , pet names, pet rocks, ,   

    LET BYGONES BE BYGONES 

    It’s nice for children to have pets — until the pets start having children. –Evan Esar

    • * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

    I think if I owned a pet (be it dog, cat, or rock), I would name it BYGONES….if for no other reason than just thinking of that name suggested the idea for a post such as the one you’re reading. But beyond that, there is this: by God, any pet I own deserves a name that is not only as unique as some of the names we give our kids, but reflects my forgiving nature. Thus (for example), if my pet rock would decide to follow a cat up a tree and get stuck, I’d be willing to tell my rock I forgive it for being stuck up….and let Bygones be Bygones.

    Now, I’ll admit that “Bygones” may not be the most sexy pet name in the world, but as you might conclude from the opening quote, “sexy” & “pet” aren’t the mix I’d look for if I were looking for my ideal pet (more up my platonic pet alley would be, not a cool cat or hot dog, but an ugly rock). After all, how are we to control the pet population if we keep giving our pets such seductive names as these actual pet names gleaned from Google-eyed research:

    BABY CAKES
    BIG DADDY
    BLOSSOM BUTT
    BOO BOO
    BUNBUNS

    CHUNKY BUNNY
    CUDDLE CAKES
    CUTIE PATOOTIE
    FLUFFER-NUTTER
    HONEY PANTS

    HOTNESS
    HOTTIE
    HUGGALUMP
    KISSY FACE
    LADY KILLER

    LOVE MUFFIN
    LOVER BOY
    LOVER GIRL
    McSTEAMY
    MISTER CUTIE

    MONKEY BUNS
    MOOKIE-POOKIE BEAR
    NUM NUMS
    PARADISE
    POP TART

    PUSSY CAT
    SCHMOOOOKY POOKIE POOO
    SEXY MAMA
    SNOOGYPUSS
    UNCLE UPRIGHT

    Come on, admit it — even if you perchance to be the most domesticated of creatures, you might turn into a tiger if you were called any of the above by a sex of the opposite member….not to mention, if called such censored terms of endearment as these:

    So, until we meet again, my little winky-dinky petsy-wetsy….

     

     

     

     
    • scifihammy 3:16 am on July 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      haha Fun post 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

    • linnetmoss 7:15 am on July 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Actually, “rhubarb pie slice” isn’t so bad. Rube for short? But when we get another cat I am planning to name it Sven-Olaf. Unless it’s a girl.

      Liked by 2 people

    • Carmen 7:24 am on July 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Well, mr moozy-woozy, that was absolutely hilarious. 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

      • mistermuse 10:34 am on July 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        Carmen, you left yourself open to being called ms. floozy-woozy in return, but I shall resist the temptation by virtue of your character, which I assume is beyond reproach. 🙂

        Like

    • arekhill1 11:45 am on July 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Uncle Upright sounds vaguely incestuous and perverse. I’d go with that.

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 1:29 pm on July 25, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      I think it depends on where you live, Ricardo. In my neighboring state of Kentucky, I hear it’s not considered incestuous at all.

      Liked by 1 person

    • BroadBlogs 11:34 pm on July 26, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Good theme. And know that I miss your comments.

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 10:07 am on July 27, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Thanks. I haven’t been able to do much commenting on other blog posts in the past few weeks due to “events beyond my control” (aka life is what happens when one has other plans). Hopefully things will return to normal (if there is such a thing) before long.

      Liked by 2 people

    • literaryeyes 1:00 pm on July 28, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      I have a huge grey and white male cat named Buttons. Go figure! Sometimes I call him Butterball.

      Liked by 2 people

    • mistermuse 5:20 pm on July 28, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Most cats seem indifferent to whatever you call them, so if he’s a fat cat, you might as well call him BUTTERBALL….or even FEED ME, as a sort of reminder of your duty to him.

      Like

      • Michaeline Montezinos 2:37 pm on July 29, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        I took in a stray dog I saw trying to go to the church one chilly November day in Ohio. No one claimed it so I became the owner. My daughter, her friend and I were walking Victor (that is what I named him ) along the rural suburban roads. Stopped to let him tinkle while my daughter and her friend, Stacy, burst out laughing. Then I found out my Victor was a Victoria and my face burned red with embarrassment. Also this reminded me of that movie with Julie Andrews and James Garner. It was called Victor/Victoria and it was about men and women cavorting nicely around the stage dressed as the opposite sex .My first and only childhood dog was a male named Bucky and he was lucky that I took care of him. My brothers didn’t care so I adopted Bucky who would do fun tricks in our beat up. back yard. Oh! what wonderful memories for my Mom. Bucky never had an “accident” in our house.

        Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 6:10 pm on July 29, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Very interesting. I haven’t had a dog since I was a kid and haven’t wanted one since, but I still think almost every kid should have a dog or pet of some kind (and be responsible for taking care of it).

      Like

      • Michaeline Montezinos 7:06 pm on July 29, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        I have seen kids adopt fossils( not me) moon rocks, gemstone crystals and wilderness creatures as pets. Strange that two different species will bond together as a couple on the Animal Kingdom TV show without any hint of incest. mistermuse. Could these creatures know something that we don’t? iT IS NOT ABOUT REPRODUCTION BUT THE CUDDLING, KEEPING BABIES FED AND WARM. IT SEEMS TO BE THE SHARING OF CREATURE COMFORTS IN ORDER TO HELP THEM SURVIVE { sorry ABOUT THE CAPITAL LETTERS} my little finger is bent and hits the wrong key.

        Liked by 1 person

    • eths 6:23 pm on August 1, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Blossom butt! You’re kidding!

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 9:13 pm on August 1, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Every name on that list was given by a pet owner to their pet. Some of them, the pet should have given back and said (in pet language) what you said: “You’re kidding!”

      Like

      • Carmen 9:26 pm on August 1, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        I’ve run into some children in that same circumstance. .. For instance, there’s a child in my province named Satan. ..yes, really.

        Liked by 1 person

        • mistermuse 10:29 pm on August 1, 2016 Permalink

          The devil you say! (That’s an old saying I remember from decades ago, but I’d never found an opportunity to use it until now. Thank you!)

          Like

    • Michaeline Montezinos 10:11 pm on August 1, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      How does child named Satan feel when he/she goes to school’ My friend told me she heard or read the news that Devil worshipers are now having their children go to a Satanic Preschool and then Kindergarten with the same curriculum. These families insist they are breaking any laws. They also feel that the teachers there will give their kids the “proper” education. I wonder if they also have Satan’s Grooming for your Pet. I guess you could call their canine Devil Dogs.The world is going to the dogs, I guess no pet or child is safe now..

      Like

      • Michaeline Montezinos 10:16 pm on August 1, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        I meant to write ” Their families insist they are NOT breading any laws..” At least they are not carrying guns.
        Whatever events have reshaped hour life, mistermuse, I hope you will be back on your feet very soon. Your previous posts are still great to read., Please take care of yourself.

        Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 10:37 pm on August 1, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      The “events beyond my control” I referred to in a previous comment had little to do with my health, so there’s nothing to get back on my feet from. Nonetheless, I thank you for your concern, and otherwise, things are back to normal

      Like

      • Michaeline Montezinos 10:50 pm on August 1, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        Not worried about being back on your feet? I hope you did not type all of this standing up, my friend.
        I am just being a sarcastic devil cat.

        Like

    • mistermuse 2:41 pm on August 2, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Not-with-standing your sarcasm, Michaeline, I shall move on to thinking about my next post, which I expect will keep me on my toes for the next few days..

      Like

  • mistermuse 2:23 pm on January 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: Bad hair day, cats, , , sacred cats   

    CAT CULLS 

    Cats, as a class, have never completely got over the snootiness caused by the fact that in ancient Egypt, they were worshiped as gods. –P.G. Wodehouse

    • * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

    The above quote is left over from quotes I considered using in my previous post (REIGNING CATS & DOGS TODAY) until I decided to separate it out to set up the following poem. It’s a poem I published several years ago on a site which shall remain nameless because I promised I would no longer name it when I re-publish poems it deleted. Nonetheless, after taking extraordinary care to keep my promise, I suspect that Some Will Indict me for breaking the spirit, if not the letter, of that vow. To them I say, Speak Without Interpreting my intentions, which are as steadfast as a Swivel With Instability.

    In the Castle of Zorayda, there
    is displayed a 2,400 year old rug
    made from the hair of sacred cats
    which were worshiped by ancient
    Egyptians along the Nile River
    in the Valley of the Kings.

    One might wonder how the fur of
    supposedly sacred felines wound up
    as rugs, fit for nothing better than
    to be tramped on by mere mortals,
    the likes of you and yours truly.
    But it seems this particular rug was

    culled to wrap and embalm a mummy,
    which, for a high roller, beats ending up
    as fur on the floor. So, the next time
    you’re having a bad hair day, remember
    worse things have happened to better,
    holier — and hairier — cats than you.

     
    • arekhill1 2:29 pm on January 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Every day is a bad hair day for me. Worshiping cats will not make it any better.

      Like

      • mistermuse 5:13 pm on January 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply

        I’m half bald but I still have to pay full price for a haircut. Whether that’s a bad hair day or half a bad hair day, I don’t know.

        Like

    • ladysighs 3:06 pm on January 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      I’m glad you republished it. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 5:16 pm on January 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Thanks. Actually, I re-worked it quite a bit, so it’s only about half republished. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    • Don Frankel 6:04 am on January 28, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Muse I’m glad you re-published as otherwise all it would have been for us was…

      Like

    • mistermuse 7:04 am on January 28, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Don, I’m glad you posted this clip to help us remember what truly great theater music is. As the Andrew Lloyd Weber lyric says, “Let the memory live again.”

      Like

    • raechelshearttoheart 11:53 pm on January 28, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      i have way more hair than a cat.

      i’m having a flashback to 5th through 12th grade. you reminded me, about violin strings. so i googled this and the first thing says a myth, but wikipedia says the E string was cat gut…

      Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 8:09 am on January 29, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Sounds like you’re a longhair, which I have no doubt is very becoming in your case.

      As for the rest, that certainly makes more sense than a G-string with fat gut, which would not be very becoming at all.

      Like

  • mistermuse 3:10 pm on January 26, 2015 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , cats, , , , ,   

    REIGNING CATS & DOGS TODAY 

    According to a recent article in the Cincinnati Enquirer, “Frank, a cat, lay sick as a dog” and “in critical need of care”at a local boarding kennel a few years ago, while the cat’s owners were out of the country. They could not be reached, so the kennel’s owner rushed Frank to a 24-hour facility “which is like the Mayo Clinic for animals” instead of his regular veterinarian.

    The “Mayo Clinic” saved Frank (so-named after Ol’ Blue Eyes, Frank Sinatra), but when his owners returned home and went to pick him up, the bill was $2,600+ more than their regular vet would’ve charged. Long story short, owners hired attorney, sued kennel owner. Case finally comes to a hearing January 2015. Verdict: kennel had acted reasonably. Frank’s owners not only lost the case, they lost Frank, who had died in the meantime. They now have a dog.

    What am I make to of all this? Another post about old sayings and proverbs, of course….but limited to cats and dogs — though human readers are welcome to tag along too. This being a pet-friendly site, there will be some doggone purrfect quotes but no trick sayings thrown in (as was the case in my Jan. 23 post GEORGE (STILL) ON MY MIND). Today, cats and dogs reign!

    The dog may be wonderful prose, but only the cat is poetry. –French proverb

    Cats are smarter than dogs. You can’t get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. —Jeff Valdez

    Cats were put into the world to disprove the dogma that all things were created to serve man. –Paul Gray

    No mater how much the cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens. —Abraham Lincoln (who apparently didn’t feel free to say the same of humans)

    The cat loves fish, but is loath to wet her feet. –English proverb

    The man who carries a cat by the tail learns something that can be learned in no other way. —Mark Twain

    You own a dog but you feed a cat. –Jenny de Vries

    A cat is the only domestic animal I know who toilet trains itself and does a damned impressive job of it. –Joseph Epstein

    In order to keep a true perspective of one’s importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him. –Dereke Bruce

    The cat is domestic only as far as suits its ends. –Saki

    Speaking of ends….

     

     

     

     

     
    • arekhill1 3:30 pm on January 26, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      No one who sends me an unexpected $2600 bill can expect me to act reasonably.

      Liked by 2 people

      • Joseph Nebus 11:28 pm on January 26, 2015 Permalink | Reply

        I have to agree there. My unexpected-bill-reasonableness tops out pretty well below $2600. I say this after an unexpected-bill for about $600 in car repairs a few months ago that I’m still twitching over. (We saved the car.)

        Liked by 1 person

    • mistermuse 5:54 pm on January 26, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      I don’t know who’s picture is on a $2600 bill (maybe Frank Sinatra’s?), but I’d investigate — it might be counterfeit.

      Like

    • Michaeline Montezinos 6:59 pm on January 26, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      I thought the quotes were funny and cute. Especially since I have such ‘fond’ memories of all the cats and dogs my daughter brought home. Not to mention the gerbils, a hamster, a guinea pig, and a blue parakeet cleverly named “Birdie.” The reason I remember Birdie is when he finally dropped dead in its cage (literally,) my daughter was so inconsolable. So I proceeded to pretend to give the bird CPR. I guess she thought I could bring the poor thing back to life. Sigh!

      Like

    • mistermuse 9:08 pm on January 26, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Well, there are men named Manny, so it seems perfectly logical to call a bird Birdy….or, for that matter, call a gerbil Gertie or Billy, a hamster Hammy, and a guinea pig Piggy. I don’t know about a fish, however – that might sound Fishy.

      Like

    • Don Frankel 9:20 am on January 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      I would say this is purrfect.

      Muse, Sinatra is on the $2,000 dollar bill.

      Like

    • mistermuse 11:10 am on January 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Thanks, Don. I should point out, just for the record, that the “Mayo Clinic for animals” bill was $3,800. $2,600 was the amount over and above the $1,200 Frank’s regular vet testified he would’ve charged for the same procedure. But the Sinatra angle is pertinent because the cat had blue eyes, which is why his owners named him Frank, and since there was no $2,600 bill for Sinatra to be on, I’m glad to know he’s on the $2,000 bill.

      Like

      • Michaeline Montezinos 9:09 pm on January 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply

        I thought your renaming of the exotic pets was special, Muse. I know you are more into jazz and the good songs of the 20’s and 30’s. This is not a fish tail but a true story linked to a “famous musical icon” of the past century.

        We had five goldfish we inherited from illegal aliens who were evicted. Eventually they shared the aquarium with the turtle and some tropical fish. My daughter took the aquarium to her house after we got tired of cleaning it.

        Later she discovered one of the goldfish had turned completely white but his brothers remained the same color. Thereafter, they were known as the Jackson Five. The white fish was tagged as Michael Jackson. When that fish (not named Wanda) died years later, we did not bury him in a sacred cat fur blanket. Michael would’ve hated that.

        Like

    • mistermuse 10:42 pm on January 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Good story. For those not familiar with it, “A Fish Called Wanda” was a very funny early ’80s movie starring a Cleese called John, a Curtis called Jamie Lee, and a Kline called Kevin. As for a Jackson named Michael, the best I can say is, to each his own.

      Like

    • imaginenewdesigns12 1:19 am on January 31, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Thank you for liking “The Blue Hour,” “Twilight,” and “Snowstorm.” I like your post, especially the quotes. My cats are demanding pets, but at least they give me a lot of affection in return. I can see in their eyes how grateful they are that I take care of them (except when I take them to the vet for shots and medical treatment). 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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