TEN INFERNAL QUESTIONS

“By nature’s kindly disposition, most questions which it is beyond man’s power to answer do not occur to him at all.” –George Santayana, philosopher

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Every once in a while, I peruse my bookshelves looking for a book I haven’t yet read ((of which I have more than a few), or even a book I may want to re-acquaint myself with or consider discarding. The other day, I dusted off one such even/or tome titled TEN ETERNAL QUESTIONS, in which the author asked notable leaders, artists and scientists such questions as Do you think this life is all there is or do you believe in an afterlife?, Do you believe you have a destiny?, and What advice or words of wisdom would you like to pass on to those close to you?

A sample answer is the following (partial) reply by actor Peter Ustinov to the first question above: “We believe in eternity out of fear that all this acquisition of knowledge is there for no reason at all. It seems a terrible waste. At the same time I am just as terrified by the idea of immortality: where does it lead to?”

As you may surmise, the book in question(s) is probably not of interest to the incurious know-nothings George Santayana must have had in mind. But my readers are nothing if not questionable, so I have decided to do a post of even more grave and stupefying questions to ponder, which I have apparently titled TEN INFERNAL QUESTIONS. Feel free to bypass any of the questions which may cause your head to explode, as I certainly don’t want your scattered brain bits on my conscience. And just to get you off on the right foot, I will follow the first question with the answer.

Why did Yankee Doodle call the feather in his hat macaroni?

If space is a vacuum, where do you plug it in?

How is it possible to survive being scared half-to-death twice?

If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why are there still monkeys and apes?

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

If you had to give up drinking alcohol or wiping your butt, which would you choose?

Can you imagine a world with no hypothetical situations?

If the 7-11 is open 24-7 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?

When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?

That’s ten. No doubt you’re begging for more, but it’s out of the question.