IT’S ABOUT A QUOTER TO NINE
Several days ago, one of my readers said she’s partial to humorous quotes, so I’ve been thinking about spending a whole lot of time thinking about devoting a post to things others have said which are funnier than what I say….but after searching high (brow) and low (brow), eye gave up. See what I mean?
Ha ha! Just kidding. Believe it or not, I was able to find nine selections funnier-than-mine (well, maybe somewhat funnier), though I’m sure I would’ve said them first if I’d thought of them first. Some of the nine guys & gals I’m about to quote said what they said before I was even born, thus taking unfair advantage of circumstances beyond my control. But this is my blog, so as a quoter of quotes, I at least get to determine the subject matter of the quotes I quote, and the quotes I’ve chosen to quote are quotes about quotes….and I quote:
“A quotation is a handy thing to have about, saving one the trouble of thinking for oneself – always a laborious business.” –A. A. Milne
“I googled the quote ‘Power means not having to respond.’ Nothing happened.” –John Alejandro King [what “Power means” sounds like something Trump might say, except nothing Trump says is worth quoting]
“Quotation: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.” –Ambrose Bierce
“There are two kinds of marriages: where a husband quotes the wife, and where the wife quotes the husband.” –Clifford Odets
“You can tell a really wonderful quote by the fact that it’s attributed to a whole raft of wits.” –Anna Quindlen
“I have made it a rule that whenever I say something stupid, I immediately attribute it to Dr. Johnson, Marcus Aurelius or Dorothy Parker.” –George Mikes
“That woman speaks eighteen languages and can’t say ‘No’ in any of them.” –Dorothy Parker
“You can always depend on children to quote you correctly, especially when it’s something you shouldn’t have said.” –Evan Esar
“I can’t see what Jack Warner [Warner Bros. movie mogul] can do with an Oscar – it can’t say Yes.” –Al Jolson
:
The Observation Post 
calmkate 2:05 am on August 29, 2020 Permalink |
I must remind myself not to eat whilst reading your posts … I nearly choked to death!
Those women look far more sexy in those slinky dresses than most gals these days in next to nothing!
… see you at 8.30, I don’t want to miss anything 😉
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mistermuse 9:00 am on August 29, 2020 Permalink |
I’m kind of partial to “next to nothing” (especially when I’m next to my wife when she’s wearing nothing), Kate — not that I have anything against sexy women in slinky dresses. 😉
As for “see you at 8:30,” I don’t know what time zone you’re in, but in 45 minutes it’ll be 12 hours since I posted this post (note the time at the top of this post). Can you guess my time zone?
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calmkate 10:14 am on August 29, 2020 Permalink
no idea, I though the states?
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mistermuse 11:41 am on August 29, 2020 Permalink
Eastern Standard (Eastern Daylight) time.
BTW, I neglected to apologize for causing you to nearly choke to death. That would’ve been hard for me to swallow, knowing that my puns are killers (I thought the worst they might do is make some readers ill).
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rawgod 3:32 am on August 29, 2020 Permalink |
I can agree with phrase one of this quote, “There are two kinds of marriages: where a husband quotes the wife, and where the wife quotes the husband.” –Clifford Odets, but my take on the rest of it is, “those that end indivorce, or those that end in death.” Which is your preference?
As for the A.A. Milne quote, I can truthfully say my fafourite person to quote is myself. That way, if I misquote myself, it is not a misquote, but merely a change of time.
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mistermuse 9:28 am on August 29, 2020 Permalink |
I’ll have to take a paincheck on choosing between those two alternatives, as I’ve never experienced either one.(though I suspect that avoiding the second would prove more difficult).
I can’t disagree about your favorite person to quote, although I sometimes wonder if I was myself when I said what I said (in which case, the George Mikes quote might prove useful).
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rawgod 11:40 am on August 29, 2020 Permalink
Say it, own it, live with the consequences. It’s not really that hard.
The main thing is be true to yourself. Say what you mean, mean what you say (maybe you can tell me who first said that?).
If someone midreads you, or misinterprets you, that is beyond your control.
The hard part is using sarcasm. You are purposely writing to mislead to make a point. Many readers, unfortunately including myself, miss sarcasm. We read it straight up. Then where do we go? My above quote about marrige/death/divorce is full of sarcasm, but can still be read straight up. Ooooohhh, wny do we write in the first place?
Because we have to!
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mistermuse 12:57 pm on August 29, 2020 Permalink
I Don’t Know WHO FIRST SAID THAT — but I do know Who’s on first and I Don’t Know is on third….not to mention What’s on second. If you ask the name of the shortstop, I Don’t Give a Damn. The rest of That routine, I don’t remember. The rest of your comment: Thumb’s up!
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rawgod 2:06 am on September 4, 2020 Permalink
Funny, but Bud and Lou never once mentioned the right fielders’ name. Here is a good example, https://youtu.be/4t4PzWSLhqQ of them at their greatest. BTW, I know who is in right field, but I made them a promise never to reveal his name, so, I can’t tell ya.
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mistermuse 7:46 am on September 4, 2020 Permalink
Something tells me the right fielder’s name is Lefty. I hope Lefty’s right, or Something’s in big trouble!
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Rivergirl 8:09 am on August 29, 2020 Permalink |
Quotes about quotes … very circular, that. And you can’t beat Dorothy Parker!
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mistermuse 9:32 am on August 29, 2020 Permalink |
Agreed! If it weren’t for the fact that I’d be dead by now, I would love to have been within earshot of the Algonquin Round Table when Dorothy and her fellow wits had at each other.
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tubularsock 1:33 pm on August 29, 2020 Permalink |
Tubularsock has always found that a quotable quote carries no risk. So where’s the fun in that?
Great post.
Cheers.
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mistermuse 3:23 pm on August 29, 2020 Permalink |
With some quotes, there’s the risk of an insight which may cause a reader to THINK (if he or she can stand the strain)….but granted, “where’s the fun in that?”
Whatever the case, thanks for the “Great post” compliment, which is fun (for me, at any rate) to quote.
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Susan 2:24 pm on August 29, 2020 Permalink |
Good selection!
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arekhill1 2:38 pm on August 29, 2020 Permalink |
“There are no stupid questions, just stupid people asking questions everybody else already knows the answer to.”
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mistermuse 3:27 pm on August 29, 2020 Permalink |
,,,,and then there’s Trump, who never asks questions, which is why he’s stupid (or, more accurately, ignorant).
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Eliza 2:20 am on August 30, 2020 Permalink |
💕 Number 3 and 8 made me giggle.
Thank you………….
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mistermuse 8:49 am on August 30, 2020 Permalink |
Number 3 is from Ambrose Bierce’s THE DEVIL’S DICTIONARY, which is definitely funnier than Webster’s Dictionary (although it’s much less ‘weighty’ than Webster’s….and takes up less room on the bookshelf too). 😉
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Eliza 10:17 am on August 30, 2020 Permalink
💕🤗
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magickmermaid 12:02 pm on August 30, 2020 Permalink |
I was surprised that Lauren Bacall wasn’t in the video. Funny quotes! I think your own writing is extremely funny. (You may quote me.) 😀
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mistermuse 6:11 pm on August 30, 2020 Permalink |
Thanks, mm. I have to be funny as long as Trump is King — I mean, President — otherwise, I’d lose my sanity (and if Trump is any example of what becomes of a man, I certainly don’t want to lose my sanity).
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magickmermaid 7:15 pm on August 30, 2020 Permalink
Get a Sanity Clause. Groucho can help. 😉
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mistermuse 7:20 pm on August 30, 2020 Permalink
Unfortunately, Groucho is deceased….and Trump isn’t. That’s not nice to say, but “consider the source” (of my discontent).
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Elizabeth 4:47 pm on August 30, 2020 Permalink |
Can I quote you on that?
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mistermuse 6:15 pm on August 30, 2020 Permalink |
Feel free, Elizabeth. If nothing else, I’m a man of my words. 😉
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Elizabeth 4:33 pm on September 2, 2020 Permalink
Good one.
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masercot 9:57 am on September 1, 2020 Permalink |
So, quotes about quotes?
Shame on you!
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mistermuse 2:19 pm on September 1, 2020 Permalink |
It would be shame on me if I quoted Trump (& his supporters’) quotes about quotes, but I will only stoop so low.
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Marietta Rodgers 11:35 am on September 2, 2020 Permalink |
You can absolutely depend on children repeating something you shouldn’t have said and constantly forgetting the things you want them to remember.
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mistermuse 2:58 pm on September 2, 2020 Permalink |
Very true. The first part of your comment is reflected in a number of DENNIS THE MENACE cartoons (still appearing every day in the local newspaper) which show Dennis repeating discomfiting things his father or mother had said about people (now, in their presence). As for forgetting things, I find that to be more manifest in old age — at least, I personally DON’T REMEMBER it being a problem as a child!
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Marietta Rodgers 3:04 pm on September 2, 2020 Permalink
It’s more about selective hearing. Ice cream: Yes. Chores: No.
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mistermuse 5:41 pm on September 2, 2020 Permalink
Absolutely. I was speaking ‘tongue in cheek’ when I probably should have kept my tongue in check. 😉
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