After coming across the right-on Wright quote I used in my last post, I did a search for more and found that the first was no fluke. There’s no shortage of equally great stuff where that came from, which allows me not only to give Steven Wright his just due,  but to do a fun post without doing most of the work. That works for me every time.

It seems he and I have a lot in common. Like me, Wright was raised Catholic, digs George Carlin & Woody Allen, thinks existential thoughts, and falls readily asleep while sitting. He does stand-up comedy, I do stand-up urinalogy. Here’s a sample of him doing his thing, followed by more Wright quotes:

Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.

If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke?

I installed a skylight in my apartment….the people who live above me are furious!

There was a power outage at a department store yesterday. Twenty people were trapped on the escalators.

I bought some batteries, but they weren’t included.

What’s another word for Thesaurus?

I think it’s wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly.

There’s a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.

My friend has a baby. I’m recording all the noises he makes so later I can ask him what he meant.

I intend to live forever. So far, so good.