As my boyhood friend William “Shakey” Shakespeare would say, “A rose by any other name would smell as sweet …. unless pissed on by a skunk.” But then, ol’ Shakey didn’t exactly have both oars in the Avon, if you get my drift, so what did he know? And as the poet “Lord” Byron once said, “Shakespeare’s name, you may depend on it, stands absurdly too high, and will go down”….proving that critics always know what they’re talking about, which happens to be my highest qualification for writing book reviews (my next highest qualification being experience — this being my second book review for T.O.P. …. though I admit to having also written a review of a book** for a blog of which I cannot Speak Without Irritation, as the post containing that review was one of hundreds expunged in the great Speak Without Interruption purge a month ago; so, alas and a lack, that review no longer exists or counts).
But enough about me. Let’s talk about IT’S GIRL SCOUT COOKIE TIME for Lesbians and Abortionists, which is by far the best book I’ve read all day, except for the small defect of having a title longer than the Hundred Years’ War, which actually lasted 116 years, but who’s counting except me, about whom I’ve already said I’ve said enough. A better title might’ve been IT’S GIRL SCOUT COOKIE TIME for Critics and Book Reviewers, as this reviewer could go for a snack along about now….but as I said, enough about me. Let’s talk about the author, one Richard “Ricardo” Cahill. But enough about him.
Before continuing, I’m not getting paid by the word — or by anything else (including the skinflint author), for that matter — so from this point on, I will refer to Senor Cahill’s hilarious opus as simply “BOOK SCOUT ,” or B.S. for short. The book’s back cover carries a disclaimer that this is a work of fiction, but that’s B.S. Actually there’s a lot of truth in B.S., but in cleverly disguised forms, such as real names, places and events. Indeed, B.S. asserts that such names as “Snooki” and “Honey Boo-Boo” represent real existent people….but reality may not really exist. It’s all rather confusing, but again, that’s B.S. for you.
Frankly, I’d very much appreciate if you’d buy and take a crack at this B.S. for yourself, as I don’t know what to make of it — though I’m sure there’s the makings of good dough in it….particularly if you’re a Girl Scout looking to sell cookies.
** a book titled NEW YORKERS (by fellow SWI contributor Don Frankel) consisting of ten short stories, of which I’d read only five when I reviewed it, so in fairness to SWI, the world really lost just half a review when that post was among those expunged.